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Open Poetry #14
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Never Learn/No Longer ... with an announcement link
| Open Poetry #14 |
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Never Learn/No Longer ... with an announcement link |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
~Never Learn~ (for my muse) I feel like I owe you an apology ... or perhaps an explanation, I know I've hurt us both ... and the pain has taken its toll on our inspiration. Maybe it will help us both to heal ... if I can make you at last understand ... with me it's always been this way ... love and heartache seem to go hand in hand. I don't deliberately try to hurt you ... it's the same as hurting me, It's just so much of who I am ... it just seems meant to be. And I'm sorry ... I know it's yet another hard heart lesson learned, God, I'm just so drawn to the flame ... but always knowing I'm gonna get burned. I didn't intend to fall so hard for him ... some things just get under our skin, he wrote me all those pretty words ... his invitation swept me in. He was just supposed to be a distraction ... a momentary reprieve ... somewhere along the line ... he became the oxygen that I breathe. Just once in my life ... I wanted to be touched in this way ... just once in my life ... I need for contentment to actually stay. I'm starting to doubt ... that touch really exists ... still the next hand that touches me ... will be just as hard to resist. Why does it seem ... that contentment always comes with a price ... why does my heart never learn ... why do I learn all the losses twice. And I know ... this need makes me so damn pathetic and weak, I already know the answers ... its the reasons that my heart seeks. I can handle the things of their hearts ... that they cant give to me, it's what they cant accept from me ... that I need to give so desperately. I wish I was more like them ... the way they turn it on and off so easily, How do you turn off honest awe ... how do you slow down pure intensity. I'm just looking for temporary sanctuary ... from this sin beneath my skin, I'm just trying to learn the rules to this game ... I cant ever seem to win. So please forgive me, my sweet muse ... for without you I am lost, I can live with an aching heart ... but loss of inspiration is just too much of a cost. I hope this helps you to know me ... helps you to finally understand ... I need you here beside me ... poets pen and heart in hand. Janet Marie **repost by request from open 8 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~No Longer~ When I look into your eyes ... and no longer see my reflection there, when your lips no longer seek mine...even then I wont believe you no longer care. When the stars all cease to sparkle ... and I am no longer the wish you wish upon, when I call to you at night ... even in the silence ... I wont accept you are gone. If I reach out for you ... and find only emptiness where your warmth used to be, If I play our special song ... and find you're not there to dance with me. If I compose you a love poem ... but find you no longer wish to read my rhyme, If I ask a prophet and he says ... fate and destiny ... passed over me this time. All these things could never convince me ... that I must now let go of you ... there is only one thing that would offer proof ... one word that would ring true. For if the time should come ... that you no longer find your inspiration in me ... that is when my heart will know ... there is no longer an us ... we now cease to be. If I am no longer your muse ... if I am no longer your reason for poetry. Janet Marie **repost by request from open 10 thank you to my "quiet fan" for requesting these to be posted again...and thank you to ALL who have written of late asking me how I am and why I havent posted new work...I am doing that dance me and my moody muse seem to know too well... Major writers block going on here....but I appreciate more than words can say the concern and encouragement. AND..one more thing.... Due to server and computer probs I am having both Email and posting problems making it very hard and time consuming to do replies right now...So accept my apologies if I am missing your poetry...or dont respond to an email. please see this in announcements if you wish for more info. /pip/Forum3/HTML/001135.html my love and respect to Poetry Land  JMI'm going crazy, I'm losing sleep. I'm in too far, I'm in way too deep over you. You'll always be the one. You were the first, you'll be the last. [This message has been edited by Janet Marie (edited 06-25-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Janet Marie - All Rights Reserved | |||
Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Sweet Lady: we all have a "moody muse" and I sent a hug to yours. You can repost any of your work anytime as it is always refreshing to read. When stuck, start digging for something that makes you smile, and when I was in your archives there sure were many! Thinking of you, and I hope you and your power get sorted out soon. (hugs) Oh - these were terrific by the way, almost forgot that part  ~*~ Tell someone you love them today, as tomorrow may never come ~*~ |
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illusion Member
since 2001-06-19
Posts 296 |
"somewhere along the line ... he became the oxygen that I breathe. Just once in my life ... I wanted to be touched in this way ... just once in my life ... I need for contentment to actually stay. I'm starting to doubt ... that touch really exists ..." Wow! Have you been reading my diary? Both poems are stunning, but this feeling is so familiar it hurts - Still, seeing the words written by another's hand assures me I'm not alone. I guess I never learn. For the hurt seems so raw and fresh and new each time - even when I read old poems that tell of the same pain, different conduit. Thank you for these remarkable poems. |
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MARK V SHELDON Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015In a corporeal internship... |
JM, you are incredibly talented. I am sincerely impressed at your capabilities. I'm also sadly appalled how shallow and clueless most guys can be with precious ladies like yourself and many others here at PIP. It depresses me to hear eloquent female experiences and perspectives on the insensitivity of men, but I find some solace to know that I'm NOT one of them. I hope your Muse returns and helps you keep the faith that there ARE good guys out there... -MVS "If you think you know it all, you have a lot to learn." |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
jan, thank you for posting these!! beautiful writings that i remember well. lovely work as always my sweet friend. i am sorry to hear about the writer's block but i also know a poetress of your calibar and grace won't be held down for too long. you will write again and your sunshine girl will read once more. love ya much!! love, me "but i see your true colors, |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
JanetMarie~ Sweet offerings from the archives of your heart. Love ya', gal ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
JM, Never fear your dragon and stinky stand by your side. And there will ever abide. My dearest Tinker Bell Love Ya. PS a great write. |
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Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
Keep on Keepin' on |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Janet Marie- this is such a beautiful and touching piece of your heart. i wasn't around the first time you posted this, but i'm so glad you've shared it again. hugs, ~vicky "...until you have read the verse on his |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
When I was first read this, I thought quite sure I didn't have a clue as to what you meant--"not me!" LOL and sigh...thanks for the dose of meds today...nothing to it but get through it--and pc probs..there ya go again, m'twin...must be that danged mercury retrograde action again...Love you. I'll go check my mail and if not, I'll e ya.  Thanks for the wisdom today!  |
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Mother_Earth Senior Member
since 2000-11-20
Posts 13701/2 year Texas & 1/2 year Michigan |
Janet Marie, if you are having such trouble with your "muse" maybe you will have to stay up all night with me! I would say that this time of non-writing has found some winners in the library. It will all come back, never fear! Beautiful words, ME |
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Gemini Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203Wisconsin, USA |
JM-As always you've hit upon all the right chords and I've felt your words. I know this loss is profound. Beautifully written, hugs to you and take care. |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
Janet, its always nice to see your reposts...that muse will come around...she just needs to be tickled a little. I like these two, somehow I think I'm alot like you... Parker |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
I love reading your poetry....reposts or otherwise....always, amazing |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
'I didn't intend to fall so hard for him ... some things just get under our skin, he wrote me all those pretty words ... his invitation swept me in. He was just supposed to be a distraction ... a momentary reprieve ... somewhere along the line ... he became the oxygen that I breathe. Just once in my life ... I wanted to be touched in this way ... just once in my life ... I need for contentment to actually stay. I'm starting to doubt ... that touch really exists ... still the next hand that touches me ... will be just as hard to resist.' 'God, I'm just so drawn to the flame' 'All these things could never convince me ... that I must now let go of you ... there is only one thing that would offer proof ... one word that would ring true. For if the time should come ... that you no longer find your inspiration in me ... that is when my heart will know ... there is no longer an us ... we now cease to be. If I am no longer your muse ... if I am no longer your reason for poetry.' Oh, m'girlie...such seriously intense words...the wait for the Return of the Muse will be well worth it, I think...even if you go a month or two or more without a single write, 'gems' like these would hold me over, no question! Well, if you couldn't already tell, I'm lovin' these, J...excellent, excellent...definitely felt these in a big way... k  p.s. thanks fer the TS links...I did get 'em...just have to get around to openin' 'em up!  it was love that first drew me, |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
I feel like I need to make the same apology to my muse, I know I have abused it and under appreciated it lately. Jan, reposts or not it is always a joy to read your words. "Build a man a fire, he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life". Terry Pratchett |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Hey Janet I hope you solve the puter problems. I know you're out there reading these comments! Love this line.... "How do you turn off honest awe ... how do you slow down pure intensity." What a great line! You're VANtastic! So is this in the repost... "If I ask a prophet and he says ... fate and destiny ... passed over me this time. All these things could never convince me ... that I must now let go of you ... there is only one thing that would offer proof ... one word that would ring true. For if the time should come ... that you no longer find your inspiration in me ... that is when my heart will know ... there is no longer an us ... we now cease to be. If I am no longer your muse ... if I am no longer your reason for poetry." Wow! That's very emotionally intense poetry....great writing my dear poet poet friend! Thanks for reposting both are excellent! Sometimes thing aren't just what they appear to be....so I'll leave you with these famous song lyrics to stimulate your imagination! We skipped the light fandango turned cartwheels 'cross the floor I was feeling kinda seasick but the crowd called out for more The room was humming harder as the ceiling flew away When we called out for another drink the waiter brought a tray And so it was that later as the miller told his tale that her face, at first just ghostly, turned a whiter shade of pale She said, 'There is no reason and the truth is plain to see.' But I wandered through my playing cards and would not let her be one of sixteen vestal virgins who were leaving for the coast and although my eyes were open they might have just as well've been closed She said, 'I'm home on shore leave,' though in truth we were at sea so I took her by the looking glass and forced her to agree saying, 'You must be the mermaid who took Neptune for a ride.' But she smiled at me so sadly that my anger straightway died If music be the food of love then laughter is its queen and likewise if behind is in front then dirt in truth is clean My mouth by then like cardboard seemed to slip straight through my head So we crash-dived straightway quickly and attacked the ocean bed" One of the most famous songs of all time.....Go figure eh! Drugs are a wonderful thing! he he! Keep in touch when you get out of the technical bind! The role of poetry is to utter the un-utterable; to open up |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Thank you EVERYONE for these wonderful replies...and for the encouragement and understanding..both about my infamous moody muse and my comp problems...I just dont want anyone to think I am ignoring them... my computer is a tired dinosaur LOL.... and I wanted to clarify something... I got a couple concerned emails and Marks very sweet reply above, made me realize some lines in "Never Learn" may be giving the wrong impression... I wrote that one last year and some parts of its "purge" is about someone who I cared for and respected very much...and I still do...but it wasnt something that was meant to be" due to both our circumstances...and I knew that going in...but my emotions all too often rule me.... the poem isnt about how "men hurt women" and I know women are just as capable of hurting a man as well... this poem is more about how I hurt myself on the choices I make and the way I let my emotions lead me...my temptations wining out over my better judgement. I know going in I'm gonna get hurt, or the situatiuon will be as such... but still I take the fall... I have always wished I had more "self protective" traits....I feel like it all makes me be weak and too needy.... anyway...I just didnt want this to be misread as a "man bashing" poem.... It aint easy being a moth  THANK YOU ALL...love ya jm I'm going crazy, I'm losing sleep. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
with me it's always been this way ... love and heartache seem to go hand in hand. ------------------------------------------ I didn't intend to fall so hard for him ... some things just get under our skin, he wrote me all those pretty words ... his invitation swept me in. ------------------------------------------ somewhere along the line ... he became the oxygen that I breathe. ------------------------------------------ Just once in my life ... I wanted to be touched in this way ... just once in my life ... I need for contentment to actually stay. ---------------------------------------- Why does it seem ... that contentment always comes with a price ... why does my heart never learn ... why do I learn all the losses twice. -------------------------------------- I can handle the things of their hearts ... that they cant give to me, it's what they cant accept from me ... that I need to give so desperately. I wish I was more like them ... the way they turn it on and off so easily, How do you turn off honest awe ---------------------------------------- I'm just trying to learn the rules to this game ... I cant ever seem to win. ------------------------------------------ Amen, Amen, Amen!!!!! *G* (Don’t worry... I’m just saying Amen, not singing it... though it’s tempting, so be grateful and count your blessings! *G*) This perpetual baffled-by-the-game-non-winner (see, I didn’t say loser *G*) absolutely loves this poem.... even knowing the circumstances behind it doesn’t keep it from aching with familiarity... this is one of those I could have written... (except for that little matter of lacking your talent *G*)... But I didn’t... so I’ll just admire the masterpiece you’ve created... and bookmark it to appreciate again and again. *S* --------------------------------------- For if the time should come ... that you no longer find your inspiration in me ... that is when my heart will know ... there is no longer an us ... we now cease to be. ---------------------------------------- I know this poem is intensely personal for you... but I also know that you’ve written a great truth for poets... we’re inspired by those who matter to us, whether that inspiration finds its way to verse or not. (Now if only I’d accepted that wisdom sooner, I could have saved a certain foolish blonde a lot of hurt and heartache... but we’ve already established some of us never learn! LOL) Beautiful work, JM! [This message has been edited by suthern (edited 06-28-2001).] |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
"He was just supposed to be a distraction ... a momentary reprieve ... somewhere along the line ... he became the oxygen that I breathe." Oh my oh my oh my ... such a wonderful outpouring of emotions JM. I could feel this one beautifully ... a lovely flow of both thought and meter. Keep that heart and pen in hand, and write us some more beauties gator-gal. I loved this! Best wishes, /Kit |
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SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~J,...please know that every word is embedded in my skin. I've been back to this numerous times, and with every read I am more and more immersed in them. As always, your release is powerfully gripping. *Peace gurly. ~A. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Janet, my friend...I'm sorry I didn't see this til now...You with your passion so strong, I never tire of your poetry...Never! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Ruth .....I know that you know, tho I wish so many didnt relate...but then what would a moth write about *G*...and YES you have written these same feelings in your powerful emotive way that is uniquely you.....and I thank you for your always generous and accepting replies...I wish I could say a year later...I was any better...but then... "NEVER LEARN" ...tis the moth creedo. Thank you dear poetess.Kit ... girl ya make me smile...and as for that pen in hand...*sigh* ..Im trying... moody moth muse thank you so much groovy gatorSpitFire...hey A ....better becareful immersing in these words...could be like quicksand *smile*....it always helps to know others feel the same way..tho I wish for all of us to be kinder to our selves....I thank ya sweet poetess pal..for always seeing a better me in my words. Martie...no need to apologize... you were gone fishing LOL...thank you my friend... your words touch me... again. THANK YOU ALL love ya jm We're all feeding our lonely like it might go away, |
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