Ode To An Alky - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Open Poetry #14

Ode To An Alky

RSWells
Member Elite

since 2001-06-17

Posts 2533

0 posted 2001-06-18 11:02 PM

The rootless tumbleweed,
Never knowing which end's up,
Skitters across dry surface
With no flight plan.
And with it's goaless,
And always brief
Existence,
Becomes drier,
More brittle and defenseless,
It sheds pieces
In places
It will never remember being.

At one time it was alive,
And vibrant,
And lush.

Lush

Your alcoholism,
The panacea for your pain,
Has you drifting,
End over end.
Losing your looks,
Losing belongings,
Losing friends.

Losing.

In spite of
My own full plate of pain,
I did try to help.
But in the end,
You were a far better
Mary Magdelene,
Than I was,
A Jesus.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

1 posted 2001-06-18 11:38 PM

this is very good...
well written with a raw honesty...
superb employ of metaphor and imagery to make the comparisons of the tumbleweed and alcoholism...
very well done...
welcome to Poetry land...
its nice to have you here.
take care
jm

she said I dont know why you ever would lie to me
like I'm a little untrusting when I think that the truth is gonna hurt ya
~MB20~

Mabel A. Dilley
Senior Member

since 2001-03-17

Posts 859
Seattle, WA, USA

2 posted 2001-06-18 11:42 PM

Very good analogy. I loved the twist at the end. Wise the man who knows he can save none other but himself. Excellent.

"I am not now that which I have been."

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

3 posted 2001-06-19 04:44 AM

Yes I agree you did a great job on the analogy used in this poem and there are no losses likes those of an alcoholic or drug abuser. Great job Richard.

~*~ Remember to tell someone today that you love them as tomorrow may never come ~*~

RSWells
Member Elite

since 2001-06-17

Posts 2533

4 posted 2001-06-19 07:15 AM

Both abled and enabled, takes some wisdom to disengage, sorry about the label but I'd rather write than rage. Thank you kind folks.

"Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to decieve"

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.