Open Poetry #14 |
The Voyage |
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Rewrite: The Voyage Steeped from grieves, as tea from leaves Thrust by mist of memories lust. Our wiles hang, on mustang weaves On the black of omnibus Devout of drought fear or doubt Inner right its driving light. Never will it come about Till shoal or goal into sight. There’s a key will come to be For every try there’s a latch For every lock there’s a key For every key there’s a match. The soul steers this lover’s course To an end that’s yet be won For love is a magic force That melds two souls into one. I know two souls fill the nest And it’s only this I quest. |
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© Copyright 2001 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
quote: Truth! Wonderful! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Thank you Sunshine. *L* |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
The soul steers this lover’s course To an end that’s yet be won For love is a magic force That melds two souls into one. I know two souls fill the nest And it’s only this I quest. =============================== Sounds like a sail into serenity on the love boat I'll get me waterwings ready *L* *ww* me |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
How wonderfully said... Regards, sudhir "I was born intelligent - education ruined me" |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
JM, We'll go on Randys back. Winkiewinkie Stinky Sudhir, Thanks for the wonderful. |
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MyEnchanted_Melody Senior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 1106across the land of dreams. In your heart, I'd always be. |
There’s a key will come to be For every try there’s a latch For every lock there’s a key For every key there’s a match. The soul steers this lover’s course To an end that’s yet be won For love is a magic force That melds two souls into one. I know two souls fill the nest And it’s only this I quest. ========================== and it's only this I quest...... Quite wonderful........deep and eloquent Thank you ********************** It's only me.......only me |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Enchanted, Thank you for the eloquent. |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
This is wonderfully penned with such heart. There are two lines that would be tightened by one less syllable me thinks. Let me know if you're interested in my humble opinion. Yes, humble, for your poetry is so broad in its spectrum of message and vocabulary. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
VAS, Why not, what lines and thanks for the comment. |
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