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Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

0 posted 2001-06-08 05:50 AM

There is sweetness here in the morning moon,
when the light still hides behind the dark.
Through a rain speckled window,
there seeks a wind too inviting to my cheek.
Sitting proudly here with thoughts dressed in nudity,
words calmly quell an inner fire,
that needs a tender hand to moderate its raging temperature.
Here the soft glow on a tired face speaks of endurance,
to a pressure too often brought up and down in waves,
all equal to the touch of a hand that still extends into my soul.
Back bent in diligence over the labor of loving friendship,
I am acquiring a new set of scars that seem to hold some power,
to open and close at the will of one insistent voice.
The voice is there even when it is absent,
for it is ever stamping a path,
through the lush garden's of my willing beating open organ of life.
I am as powerless as a blade of grass in a torrent of storm wind.
I must bend and endure the somewhat delicious strength of not snapping,
but the storms tease mercilessly with inviting fervor,
asking that I step out in their rains,
and yet quicken my steps toward cover lest I be too long out there and drown in a puddle.
But ohh how I would love to curl up in one single puddle,
and listen for the rain to tickle surface,
and touch the ripples from beneath,
interrupting them...smoothing them as not to stir up the cloudy stench of conflict.
But the storms, they insist and I love them too much not to comply each time.
Each time the hand is extended, I grasp it perhaps to mightily.
Each time the hand is taken away, I back away and smile in acceptance,
And this,
I do
for one single purpose.
To keep a friend and prove my love,
Accepted or denied.

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

1 posted 2001-06-08 06:02 AM

Wow I would love to know how you would do reading this at a slam, bet you would win that thing hands down. I started to pick lines out to quote, but they looked too good right where they were....great job!

~*~ Remember to tell someone today that you love them ~*~

ethome
Member Patricius

since 2000-05-14

Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

2 posted 2001-06-08 06:23 AM

               "But the storms, they insist and I love them too much not to comply each time.
                 Each time the hand is extended, I grasp it perhaps to mightily.
                 Each time the hand is taken away, I back away and smile in acceptance,
                 And this,
                 I do
                 for one single purpose.
                 To keep a friend and prove my love,
                 Accepted or denied."

Wonderful muse throughout!  I love this conclusion!

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

3 posted 2001-06-08 07:53 AM

excellent piece.. good use of images, language and flow to convey the emotions..

Watersign6
Senior Member

since 2001-05-25

Posts 823
Hurricane,WV

4 posted 2001-06-08 07:59 AM

this is just outstanding and magnificent
i enjoyed every line every word

Aimster
Member Elite

since 2000-02-19

Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC

5 posted 2001-06-08 09:57 AM

temptress...

my gosh girl! now this is something
that i will read again and again. the
imagery in this paints such a vivid
picture in the reader's mind but i read
it twice and both time i came away
with two different perspectives. let
me read this again and i'll get back to
you on more detail. till then take care.
just beautiful writing dear.

amy

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart & can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

6 posted 2001-06-08 12:54 PM

wow. . . you should really read this out loud. . . it begs to be done so. . .

excellent. . .

--------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

7 posted 2001-06-08 12:58 PM

What more to say? You've scored big here

Passions Voice
Member

since 2000-10-23

Posts 291
Michigan

8 posted 2001-06-08 07:46 PM

This begs so much of the reader.

I like it.

passion is life. . . ~Diana

Irish Rose
Member Patricius

since 2000-04-06

Posts 10263

9 posted 2001-06-08 08:05 PM

This shows so much of your heart!

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee

Logan
Senior Member

since 2001-05-28

Posts 1641
Arkansas

10 posted 2001-06-08 10:23 PM

Ahhh, gentle maid, there is nothing to say, as you said it all, and much better than any poor words of mine. You grow higher each day, limbs spreading out to the sun, the moon , and the rain...gentle smile

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