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Tiersdin
Member Elite

since 2000-11-17

Posts 2364
east coast

0 posted 2001-06-04 07:08 PM

Wasted breath
tortured sighs
babes in need
of lullabyes
abandoned dreams
silent cries
tenderheart
begins to die
spread so thin
cannot survive
sliced & served
as humble pie
nothing left
to give or try
leave or stay
fire or fry
smiling face
is but a lie
babes hear
sweetest
lullabyes...

~Tier
6/01

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

1 posted 2001-06-04 08:06 PM

there are two sides to this. . . and they face off here in stark contrast to each other. . .

well done. . .

------------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

lunatic
Member

since 2001-04-20

Posts 172

2 posted 2001-06-04 08:51 PM

Just a wonderfully enjoyable read

Not the subject, the talent

Let thy moon arise. William Blake

[This message has been edited by lunatic (edited 06-04-2001).]

Logan
Senior Member

since 2001-05-28

Posts 1641
Arkansas

3 posted 2001-06-04 09:31 PM

Ahh Tier, been there done that too, save just a piece of the day for you, if only in a dream...this is why mothers are saints...gentle smile

JLR
Senior Member

since 2001-02-04

Posts 1785

4 posted 2001-06-05 01:00 AM

So many ways to hear...the loss is real.

Poeminister
Senior Member

since 2000-02-26

Posts 1862
Regina SK; Canada

5 posted 2001-06-05 01:17 AM

Nicely expressed. Enjoyed the read.

PM

SilentSongs
Junior Member

since 2001-05-31

Posts 43
Mist of Time

6 posted 2001-06-05 01:41 AM

A starkly sad writing. The minimalistic and nonstop form add to the pain it bears.

Solid write, sad read.

"The past my prison, confined in solitary voiceless penance."

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

7 posted 2001-06-05 03:57 AM

This is the worst part: "smiling face
is but a lie", and as each mask gets torn away, the pain worsens! Great write on this one.

~*~ Remember to tell someone today that you love them ~*~

Tiersdin
Member Elite

since 2000-11-17

Posts 2364
east coast

8 posted 2001-06-05 11:55 AM

Thank you all for commenting on this poem, I didn't think that it would get much response but I'd felt the need to post it. I have to tell you that your comments touched me deeply. *Hugs & love to you all*

~Tier

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