Open Poetry #13 |
Real Heroes |
Panne447 Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 196S.A. TX |
Real Heroes Concerned with myself, I walked the streets of life the pavers of cities, the sidewalks of suburbs unseeing. I know they are there. I have seen them ~ unnoticed them (by choice?)~ the heroes of survival who break a found half-chewed sandwich to share with another; who give one shoe found in Monday’s pick-up to a stranger in need of two soled shoes; who smile at passers-by (me?) that do not even stop to give them a dime. An old fellow traveler, a young lost soul, a family fading from poverty, a student no longer in school these are the real heroes whose address is a box or a car who decorates his life in a shopping cart While my shadow slips over them in the sunlight dims their streetlamp in the moonlight and gives them nothing ~ not even a smile. Why? because I am so poor I can’t even afford to pay attention. by Panne iPlease ask for permission before you copy my work to your files or a greeting card. Thank you. Panne/i |
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© Copyright 2001 Panne447 - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
The last two lines wrapped it all up....I shall never be that poor....I hope..... |
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Brad Majors
since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647Georgia |
I like this piece. You have alot of skill and soul as well! Enjoyed |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Enjoyed this interesting poem and like Sunshine, the last two lines were a great conclusion. |
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Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
At least you recognize it. Well done! Live for love. Without love, you don't live. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
This is quite adeptly done - I see a great deal of wisdom and writing skill wrapped nicely together here.. Superb.. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
panne, this is as close to true poetry in my book as it gets..a very insightful way of looking at what one sees every day in a new light..very well done |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
The work can be praised, but the HEART of this poem is amazing. I really enjoyed this. Thank you for caring. |
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painted lady Junior Member
since 2001-04-01
Posts 48on the wing or nectaring |
Or because we move too fast to care. In another time zone, are we? Nice work, Panne447. And then my heart with pleasure fills, And dances with the daffodils. Wm Wordsworth (I Wondered Lonely as a Cloud) [This message has been edited by painted lady (edited 04-10-2001).] |
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Packratmike Senior Member
since 2001-02-25
Posts 632California, USA |
Nice poem Panne. I agree with the comments about the last two lines. Mike |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
Great poem, Panne. "Inasmuch as ye have not given unto the least of one of these my brethren, ye have not given unto me." And everyone has a story. I wish we could hear them all...... Thanks, for the reminder.. "I hate quotes, they suck!" |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
powerful stuff here! I agree with every other comment as well. That last line is gripping! I would love to make a copy of this and share it with a few friends. Do I have your permission? It could certainly be the springboard for a stewardship meditation! |
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Nicolette Fox Junior Member
since 2001-04-10
Posts 10Michigan |
I live downtown in a large city, and see people like the ones you discribe everyday. I'm glad to know that someone else cares enough to think about the unfortunate people who have no place to call home, and who can respect the integrety that many of them have. The homeless man who stands by the gas station asking for change always makes me smile by asking how my songwriting is going. That these are real people is something that so many people are blind too, and I share in your sadness at recognising that. Profound poem! |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Panne, I can't tell you how important poems like these are. I wrote something called, My Two New Frieds ( a true story) about a homeless man I befriended, and during that short friendship I was humbled by their wisdom, tolerance of ignorance, and above all else their integrity. Thanks for your wisdom in writing this down for those who have no voice. I respected your writing. |
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Effigy Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486disbelief |
Very, very well done. I enjoyed your writing very much. Keep it up. |
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Panne447 Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 196S.A. TX |
Thank you all for taking the time to read and for your insights and comments. Sunshine, I am afraid I have been that poor on occasion and hope I shall never be again. Brad, thanks so much. I am glad you enjoyed this piece. Martie - thank you - the last 2 lines were the impetus for this piece. Interloper - thanks so much Nan - thank you for the superb - It is interesting how the ones I think are so so and the ones I think are superb are never the same ones... Balladeer, thank you so much - your comments mean a lot. PoetseVine, Thank you for reading and feeling your heart thru this piece. pl, thank you - yes sometimes we move to fast and sometimes we are prejudiced against the homeless and sometimes we just don't think. Mike, glad you came in to read and thank you. coyote, yes we all have stories and we all have 'reasons' to avoid the ones whose stories are worse than ours. Your welcome and Thanks. VAS, Thank you also for coming in and commenting. I appreciate your input. Nicollete thank you for sharing your story and for your input. Mysteria - thanks so much - where is your poem- I will check it out Effigy - Thank you - with God's Grace I hope to continue. Thank you all for you kind comments. They are very much appreciated. Panne |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
panne, i enjoyed this a lot..will try to do a personal critique for you after christmas.. hope life is well.. |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
well, i never did that critique but i still like this.... |
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Panne Junior Member
since 2001-01-31
Posts 15South TX, USA |
Thanks Kai Le, Look forward to it if you still want to critique it - it's been a while since I wrote this and am not sure I can still post a reply in PIP- so I shall see and you will too- lol Panne |
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