Open Poetry #13 |
Mr. Tramp |
Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Mr. Tramp At the genesis of the long kingly highway, Mister Velocity is on a speedy move; He has a will to run and belly on forest fire As uninhibited as a drifter's desire. And while the rhapsody of his vagabond soul Is dancing fluidly with the flow of the breeze, The mighty mass of his lazy flesh lays relaxed Bathing under the sun of languid afternoons. He wants horizons to change like baloney talks As he warms a sense of wanderlust with itchy feet, He wants to move against the sands of flowing time And he wants to sail into open dreamfilled seas. And once in a while he does not mind staggering With thoughts of bygone nights and lost destinations. (*!*) |
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© Copyright 2001 Sudhir Iyer - All Rights Reserved | |||
Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
This is quite vivid, so vivid in fact, the next time I fix a baloney sandwich, I'm going to wait for it to say something to me!!!! I enjoyed this, Sudhir..... Kathleen |
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INclan Senior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 1024Indiana, USA |
Sudhir, I enjoyed reading your posting. I identify with the following: "And while the rhapsody of his vagabond soul Is dancing fluidly with the flow of the breeze, The mighty mass of his lazy flesh lays relaxed Bathing under the sun of languid afternoons." While not a tramp, I have spent my share of afternoons under a shade tree, with a beer, thinking great thoughts. Well written! INclan |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Kathleen, Thank you so much for coming by ... INclan, I do appreciate your visit and comments very much ... many thanks Regards to all, Sudhir |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Once you got going this one really took off Sudhir... At first I thought it was a bit rich with adjectives but as you progressed these leaned out nicely... enjoyed it! There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
The mighty mass of his lazy flesh lays relaxed... that paints a real picture, sudhir...think I'll go over to the gym in the morning! good writing.... |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Jamie, thank you for reading and your fine assessment... Much appreciated, my friend Sir Balladeer, thanks so much for coming by, adn am glad that you liked it... going to the gym, eh? regards, sudhir |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Sudhir, Enjoyed this and think it's good enough for another go round. Sy |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
And while the rhapsody of his vagabond soul Is dancing fluidly with the flow of the breeze, The mighty mass of his lazy flesh lays relaxed Bathing under the sun of languid afternoons. He wants horizons to change like baloney talks As he warms a sense of wanderlust with itchy feet, He wants to move against the sands of flowing time And he wants to sail into open dreamfilled seas. ==================== this is a VERY COOL write Sud... the imagery and theme is clever and so unique. very well done poet brilliant jm tis never easy being a moth, |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Sudhir~ I like my friends - a little on the trampy side ... 'As uninhibited as a drifter's desire.' 'And once in a while he does not mind staggering With thoughts of bygone nights and lost destinations.' How vividly refreshing are your phrases. This made for a delightful read, my friend. *Hope you are well and happy. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Eloise Senior Member
since 1999-11-27
Posts 1096Wyoming |
As always, I do enjoy your work. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Seymour, my friend, thanks for coming by and I am glad that you enjoyed this one Janet, the BRILLIANT one speaks... thank you very much Marge, in one way, being a tramp is being able to move, isnt' it? Thanks, my friend, and I am glad to have delighted you... Eloise, thank you so much, I do enjoy seeing your name here... Regards to all, Sudhir |
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