Dark Poetry #3 |
Fish Tank (By Night) |
gpc Junior Member
since 2003-03-01
Posts 43 |
Fish Tank (By Night) Soak in the buzzing warm glow, from excess electricity criss-crossing to the temples. From floating fish in cream coloured cages, trapped with one view. Keeping an eye, on who's stealing Post-It notes. The pavement throbs to the sound, of a thousand feet that aren't there. Heading south, north, anywhere but here. Their only mark, a worn instep in suburbia. The empty feeling of black side streets, punctuated by the shallow place names, interrupted by artificial angel light. An abandoned broadsheet, falls to the gutter with distant memory, distainful lyrics without music. The polarity of these magnetic buildings, reverses as tube trains grind to a halt, scared in a darkened tunnel, stationary. Those less fortunate find salvation, in the opulance of these chrome giants, the fragility of glass, an irony not lost. As day falls the free close their tired eyes, turning them to the sun that lights the buildings, so they can imagine their dirt. The fish know it's feeding time soon, but they look no more excited, they all look the same in their differences. Sweaty suits slide past shady holes, that hole is their home. they are receeding now, tricking you. You think you're the king of the jungle. But what are you? No more than they, less even, a fish. All looking the same in your differences, all floating in cream coloured cages, all keeping an eye, on who's stealing Post-It notes. [This message has been edited by gpc (09-20-2003 02:15 PM).] |
||
© Copyright 2003 gpc - All Rights Reserved | |||
littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Oh My God - this is brilliant . . . Keeping an eye, on who's stealing Post-It notes. adore it, refreshing actually and the artificial angel light . . . your metaphors are astounding gp . . . and yes, sometimes I do feel that the ones who remove themselves from "life" are truly the lucky ones Beautiful writing xxoo |
||
green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
Nice write. GIS a trickle of music from a well |
||
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
loved the metaphor... all that activity going nowhere. And the use of fishtank gives a meditative distance to the observation of this world, more tranquil from a distance than from within I fear. Excellent write, and interesting technique. I hope to read more from you soon. |
||
Insomniac Cat Member
since 2003-09-23
Posts 69The Land of the Dadaists |
I like it because it's surreal. Leaves a lot to the imagination. |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |