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Dark Poetry #3
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Eddie
New Member
since 2003-06-09
Posts 8


0 posted 2003-06-09 03:12 PM


Never ness

Pain shooting through the body,
Blood flowing from the wounds,
Existence slipping down the drain,
The agony focused on by the brain,

Falling down to never ness,
A place where I’m afraid to rest,
For if I rest for too long,
My soul will surely be gone,

Coughing blood from deep inside,
Losing my grip on reality,
The pain’s as strong as my will,
But it’s a matter of time until….

Falling down to never ness,
A place where I’m afraid to rest,
For if I rest for too long,
My soul will surely be gone,

Hearing voices in the distance,
Disgusted by the sight of me,
Now sleep is coming too,
There is nothing else I can do,

I fall down to never ness,
A place where I shall now rest,
And if I rest for enough time,
What will be Satan’s was once…..
..MINE!


© Copyright 2003 Eddie - All Rights Reserved
gyiel marlok
Member
since 2003-06-08
Posts 145
OHIO
1 posted 2003-06-09 08:25 PM


what are you saying,did you sell your soul,pain is life
Dark Kisses
Member
since 2001-06-24
Posts 364
Flat lands of Kansas
2 posted 2003-06-09 10:25 PM


Wonderful 1st post and welcome to Dark Passions.

I hope to see more....

A friend, like a candle, is most needed in the darkness.

Eddie
New Member
since 2003-06-09
Posts 8

3 posted 2003-06-10 02:31 PM


It is a representation of everlasting pain and torment
RedStoneEB
Senior Member
since 2003-06-08
Posts 772
uk
4 posted 2003-06-11 03:53 AM


yo eddie its lee

i always did like that poem even if it did nearly scare that women half to death i showed it to lol

my mind is like a dream sometimes confusing

[This message has been edited by RedStoneEB (06-11-2003 03:54 AM).]

JenniX
Junior Member
since 2003-06-05
Posts 29

5 posted 2003-06-12 11:14 AM


Beautiful poem. Excellent first post. Keep up the posting. Luv to read more.
Local Parasite
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg
6 posted 2003-06-12 02:51 PM


Ooh, nifty... I really like your descriptions, and your use of repetition is really cool with that couple of lines you brought back up.  Overall I think you've done a nice job on this poem...

Welcome to Dark #3, and welcome to Passions in Poetry.  I hope you enjoy your time here.  If you've any questions about the forum, feel free to email me or any other moderators, that's what we're here for.     Check your email for a special greeting.

Parasite

Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world.
~Percy Bysshe Shelley

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