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Dark Poetry #3
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stupefied
Junior Member
since 2003-04-26
Posts 12
dead america

0 posted 2003-05-04 12:57 PM


I remember the night
you came to me
there was a flash of blinding light
and then you were there
you beckoned me from my room
out into the night
saying “ssshhh..don’t make a sound”
your hands were cold
as cold as ice
your eyes like bullets shooting through the night
you came to me
and without a question
I trusted you
you pulled my hand
pulled me through the darkness
only a single beam to guide our way
until you stopped
abruptly
it was a parking lot
the bulb flickered in an old street lamp
there was nobody there but us
you shattered the glass and stepped through
reached up to touch the top of the door
the hallways smelled
of kerosene
of turpentine
the floor nearly glowed
you walked down the winding paths of the halls
and like a lost kitten
I followed you
helplessly until we reached
the point in which all paths met
and the floor was sort of greased
and there were people
four people standing there
and you talked but I didn't listened
I was scared now
I could tell what was going on
and my heart nearly stopped beating
as I looked down towards my feet
and noticed
a pile of dirty rags
torn shirts and pieces of tablecloth
all soaked with
turpentine
and this was it
the moment of realisation
and I couldn't move
couldn't think
couldn't see
until I heard someone scream
"run...get out now!"
and there were flames
and I was scared
until I saw your hand reach out
like an umbrella to the heated rain
I grasped your fingers and we ran
I never quite knew what was happening
until it did
it happened
but the flames caught up with us
and the walls screached and screamed
and I was gone
I couldn't see
couldn't feel
but I could smell and I could breath
and it was horrible
and I remember thinking
"this must be hell"
and hours later
I awoke
to clean sheets and a beeping machine
and I screamed
"where did he go?"
and I could see the tears in their eyes
and my mother softly whispered
and I was numb
and I screamed again
but this time it was from the pain
of losing you
she said "hunny, he died in the attempt to save your life"
and I nearly died right then and there
and that was all

you were gone and I was here
and this is what life was
and this is what death was
turpentine and kerosene
bandages and bleeding wounds
and you were gone
and I was here


"sticks and stones are hard on bones aimed with angry art...words can sting like anything but silence...SILENCE BREAKS THE HEART...

© Copyright 2003 Abby - All Rights Reserved
Mysteria
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
1 posted 2003-05-05 03:43 AM


Wow that is one gripping story poem, well done!

                 

j-oh-E
Member
since 2003-05-01
Posts 59
Texas, USA
2 posted 2003-05-05 02:39 PM


You're awesome.  What is poetry if doesn't hold
  someone's attention right?

qtpieelmo
Senior Member
since 2000-07-04
Posts 989
Sesame Street :) hee hee ,NY
3 posted 2003-05-06 11:22 AM


WoW , this was great!! Long, but it kept me on the edge of my seat the whole time & still after it was all done, I wanted to hear more! Share more soon!!


ELMO


"No man is EVER worth my tears, and the one who is, will never make me cry!"

[This message has been edited by qtpieelmo (05-06-2003 11:23 AM).]

Janette
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-07-20
Posts 2843
Chicagoland for now
4 posted 2003-05-06 09:53 PM


BRAVO!
xmutexelationx
Junior Member
since 2003-05-16
Posts 15
AmongstTheCharredFieldsOfSnow
5 posted 2003-05-19 07:18 PM


Abby!!! Hi! It's Sara... I dunno if you knew or not.  First I saw your signature, and I'm thinkin Hmm.. this is familiar.
And Then.. I saw your e-mail address in your PIP profile thing... and I'm like...hey, i have to know this person from somewhere..
Anyhow,
This is one of the preittiest things i've read from you.
I was so shocked too!  Half way though I was thinking about my reply and things like beautiful love story and such, but then I'm like... woah.  And then I got somewhat confused, with the room, and the people, but that made it even better because it puts the reader in the same state as "you" were: unsure of exactly what was going on.  This is brilliant.  Very tragic, though... tough love, I guess?
Well, I luff yah!
Keep On Writing.. I love reading you.  

..sara

"Actions speak louder than words will ever.  So I will show you my sincerity in the shape of my still beating heart"
~from.autumn.to.ashes~

BrokenDreams
Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425
In The Clouds
6 posted 2003-05-23 12:02 PM


This is soo good. I was on the edge of my seat the whole time, always wanting to know what was about to happen. This is a prime example of good poetry. my god I sound like a teacher. LoL. Anyway, it's definetly going in my library.
Jenni

Every oak tree started out as a couple of nuts who stood their
ground. --Anonymous

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