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Dark Poetry #3

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rapturedmist
Junior Member

since 2003-06-23

Posts 30
USA

0 posted 2003-06-23 01:41 PM

Shattered hearts-
broken dreams
all in a days work.

Alleviate the loneliness
break free from the pain
Confusion is the mindset
while failure is the key to success.

Mourn with me and show me the way
while this delusioness mask of happiness wears thin
and can only be measured by the drops of
blood spilling from the wrist
...the stars don't lie.

-RM
I'm not really sure if the title works...then again I was never good at titles.

mysticpoe
Senior Member

since 2003-02-28

Posts 883

1 posted 2003-06-23 03:29 PM

The title is good. Failure is the key to success. This is also very good. Like, why succeed in the way that ALL expect you to. Success can come in many forms. Real nice poem, Enjoyed.

mysticpoe

If nothing is something
then everything is
our thoughts and feelings
and all that exists.

eor
Senior Member

since 2002-09-26

Posts 959
blues & greys

2 posted 2003-06-23 06:31 PM

nice, my fav line..."happiness wears thin
and can only be measured by the drops of
blood spilling from the wrist"...often i have felt the same way...stay up...

Ladybug
Member

since 2003-06-17

Posts 236
Massachusetts

3 posted 2003-06-23 09:27 PM

Hi Rapturedmist! I really liked this poem, and have to agree with Eor -- that is my favorite line too! Good job!

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end...

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