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Dark Poetry #3
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rainy days
| Dark Poetry #3 |
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rainy days |
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kinson Member
since 2002-05-13
Posts 66somewhere between here and there |
i wake up stare at the cieling the room is dark devoid of feeling a light rain falls against the walls the phone is dead but no one ever calls sky is dark and uninviting look down the road and watch the lightning i look around the only sound is the rain as it falls and hits the ground |
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| © Copyright 2003 Chris - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Kahlil Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881 |
It's a dark place to be...wishing so hard for that voice on the phone that your senses are attuned to every raindrop. Very touching words of yours. Thanks. |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
Needs some editing. Ceiling is spelled wrong. And why do you young people insist on writing I with a small i? Please fix it and I'll give it a vote, it is a nice poem. Joyce |
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karebear07 Member
since 2003-04-15
Posts 64Texas |
Its seems as if you need some light. I have been there before and it is something that i don't want agian. i give you hope. -Kara <>< |
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StephyBob07 Junior Member
since 2003-04-18
Posts 37Texas |
i really enjoyed this poem. i have felt like that sooo many days! don't worry, you see the sunshine! ~stephy |
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silvergriffinfire Junior Member
since 2003-03-13
Posts 21middle of nowhere |
do some editing for spelling and grammer. but I really like it 'the phone is dead but no one ever calls' Descendus Averno Facillis Est |
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Mon Cherie
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922Land of Never-ending Summers |
Great job, Chris...  Aside from a typo, I really think it should go into the book...Wonder what is it about rainy days that get us all so depressing... I wrote a 'rainy' piece too, called Crying...  _,,,^.^,,,_ |
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