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Dark Poetry #3

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sister3of4
Junior Member

since 2003-04-11

Posts 16
Northumberland, England

0 posted 2003-04-11 06:06 PM

Hi, this is my first poem on this site, though it is not a new poem
The words you said struck
Like a well aimed dart,
Forced me to my knees
As your poison found my heart,
They echo in my memory,
Jangle in my ears
Trickle down my cheeks
As they mingle with my tears,
Made my soul a wasteland
That will never thaw,
Tore apart my life
Like her photo on the floor.

© Copyright 2003 sister3of4 - All Rights Reserved

MellonCollie
Member

since 2003-04-11

Posts 117
Austria,Europe

1 posted 2003-04-11 06:10 PM

nice work...I especially like the line
Made my soul a wasteland
very poetic in my opinion

how will i laugh tomorrow
when i can't even smile today

qtpieelmo
Senior Member

since 2000-07-04

Posts 989
Sesame Street :) hee hee ,NY

2 posted 2003-04-11 07:50 PM

Awe, I luv the images this painted in my head--great job!!

Hope to see more of ya soon!!

ELMO

JP
Senior Member

since 1999-05-25

Posts 1343
Loomis, CA

3 posted 2003-04-12 01:22 AM

Welcome, and well done. you will make a fine addition to our family.

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

Justbleu
Member Elite

since 1999-08-31

Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)

4 posted 2003-04-12 11:42 PM

Welcome To Passions!!!!
Hope you stay around!!!
Enjoyed this!!!
Bridgette

"Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown

sister3of4
Junior Member

since 2003-04-11

Posts 16
Northumberland, England

5 posted 2003-04-13 02:28 PM

Thanks for your welcome and your comments.

jaysh
Member

since 2003-04-16

Posts 133
IL, USA

6 posted 2003-04-26 08:25 PM

good poem, keep writing and welcome!

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