Dark Poetry #3 |
Numb |
Lisa_bebe15 Member
since 2001-11-15
Posts 151Florida |
The tears cloud the brown eyes, Slowly flowing down, Like a waterfall into a pond. Leaving a trace of black. But the smile on the face, Always comes back, Real or not. When will this stop? Day in, and day out, It’s all just an act, An act a lot of people believe. Happy once second, Sad the next. Not always sad, But not always happy. Where to turn to next? You can run, but you can't hide. This is something you can’t mess around with. Nothing is hurting, Its just all bottled up inside, And about to escape, Like a rabid dog. But once again I seem like, Just another happy go lucky girl, But deep down, I know I’m not. "Water Over Matter" |
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Superhero New Member
since 2003-01-09
Posts 6California, US |
i disagree, b/c after reading this poem, i feel a little connection to you. you and poetry mix well, as i see after reading this. you describe this intangible enemy that your poem speaks of vividly. like, the context you use when you write about it puts a reality check into it as well. |
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Moon Dust
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177Skelmersdale, UK |
Why don't they mix, u write poetry and thats good enough 4 me.Good expression on what it feels like to not let every1 see ur changing emotios I used 2 do that 2. I hope to hear from u again. If your afraid of the dark, then why did you come? |
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Eromyna Member
since 2002-11-29
Posts 306Pheonix, AZ, USA |
You shouldn't stop writing poems. You have a natural flair for wordplay. I enjoyed reading this piece. "I don't need to scream for you to deem me aggravation." |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Lisa_bebe15, I like the way you have shown the two faces the happy one and the hidden one. You describe it well, it reminds me of the the saying "you see the happy face but I'm crying all on the inside." Well done! Kethry Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Enjoyed...James |
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