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Dark Poetry #3
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Chameleon
Member
since 2002-08-07
Posts 99
Australia

0 posted 2002-11-14 06:32 AM



Siphon kiss
-----------
I am dying in a perfect red / violet trance.
Sigh, if I can't start, I'll replay.

To you- siphon suck.
To you- siphon kiss.
There are senses to know no one cares about.
Siphon suck.

I am spiralling in twilight,
I'd invite you to dance- kiss.
Numb and light.
Dying in trance-suck.
Last chance, in this tremor.
In this hum, oh so melodic.

To you.
Not me,
To you.  

© Copyright 2002 Nicholas Hall - All Rights Reserved
fractal007
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958

1 posted 2002-11-15 02:09 AM


Hm.  Interesting.  You do a very good job personifying an actual experience and critiquing and commenting on it.  This is an interesting read that I'll be putting in my library.

"If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh"

-- Magus

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
2 posted 2002-11-20 03:18 AM


Like this...James
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

3 posted 2002-12-18 12:47 PM


This should have musical backing. Maybe some light industrial? (Does such a thing exist?)
Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
4 posted 2002-12-19 12:45 PM


There are senses to know no one cares about
*******************************************
LOL, 'tis so true.
Enjoyed the write. It didn't suck.

Chameleon
Member
since 2002-08-07
Posts 99
Australia
5 posted 2002-12-23 01:45 AM


Quote bssquirrel:"(Does such a thing exist?)"

I beleive it does, as you ask it is now a song. light industrial might do well to describe it, i describe it as gothic punk.
or simply...
new wave...

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