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Dark Poetry #3
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| Dark Poetry #3 |
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Save me |
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WhileIWasGone Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486
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When the candles gutter and the bedsheets entangle me in the convolutions of an indistinctly menacing emptiness, and I wander like a lost child through gaping chasms of the unfamiliar terrain of loneliness-- When the light flickers like a moth against the face of this black world and my soul is flailed in the silent faces of loves lost in time, and I feel the nails driving me through; when there is nothing to forgive, and the penance seems too light-- It is in these times of horror when the town clock rings only a moment, and the echos follow me out of the bedroom and through the door, that I wish you were with me; only you can dispell this horror |
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| © Copyright 2002 Dea_Di_Amore - All Rights Reserved | |||
bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Wow, H., takin' lessons from Poe? Seriously, this was rich, dark and complex. I felt like I was eating chocolate cake laced with arsenic -- and liked it! Mike |
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
WOW! is right. Very Poe-ish indeed. Very nicely done! |
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Moon Dust
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177Skelmersdale, UK |
damn right was ace  If your afraid of the dark, then why did you come? |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
It amazes me how often we all confuse a cry for Divine solace with physical comforting of another being. Even ourselves. Then we quite often blame the person who tries to comfort us, for not being G-d...("G-d" out of respect for your beliefs, dear friend.) OH BOY...why must ya make me think? sigh. Mercury is retrograde. I really should just shut up, huh? *chuckle* Wonderful read, and fabulously written, as is your standard. |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Wonderful, truely. ~Ed |
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A. L. Becker Member
since 2002-09-06
Posts 167San Francisco, California |
dear WhileIWasGone, girl, do you ever miss a beat? this one was amazing. the rhythym and impact of your words is astonishing, especially in the way you convey the inner life with a few simple images. Annie! "Oh, do not ask, 'What is it?' |
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eor Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959blues & greys |
your wording was beautifuly deep...eor |
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Succubus Member
since 2002-09-30
Posts 82Canada, Ontario |
Beautifully composed, it's like a song... We all lose something or another we wish we could regain at some point in our lives... Very sad, and very powerful. Great Piece, Kisses, Succubus |
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Amaranthine Member
since 2002-10-06
Posts 61ON Canada |
I can't help but plagarize the comparison to chocolate... this poem was delicious, and as sweets also are to me, faintly nauseating... it reminds me all too firmly of my own desolate nights, before I left certain hopes behind. I tell you truly, this was Beautiful. |
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Opeth Senior Member
since 2001-12-13
Posts 1543The Ravines |
Excellent poetic story-telling... "and the bedsheets entangle me in the convolutions of an indistinctly menacing emptiness," ~ I absolutely loved these lines. |
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