The walk - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

paladin

Senior Member

since 2001-08-05

Posts 930
Pensacola,Fl.

0 posted 2002-02-27 06:29 PM

Beneath a canopy of the forest deep
A shifting haze of a summer morn
I walk because I can not sleep
Solf rain on dead leaves forlorn
Huey helo nearby.I feel it's blades
You can feel them before you hear
My mind drifts away into inky shades
For just a moment I feel the "old fear"
Will it always be there to haunt my mind
Will it grow dimmer as I grow in my age
I walk out of the shadows into the sunshine
To let my life begin on a fresh new page

[This message has been edited by paladin (02-27-2002 11:05 PM).]

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

1 posted 2002-02-27 10:52 PM

I walk out of the shadows into the sunshine
To let my life begin on a new page
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Although rather dark Bob, I do appreciate the work in this and love the uplifting ending. I do not read in Dark Passions that often, but since you post here...now I will return.

Well done, hugs, Nancy.

~Time has cast a spell on you,
So that you won't ever forget me.~

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

2 posted 2002-03-01 12:17 PM

Your poem was excellent and the cadence perfect, I thoroughly enjoyed your work.

~* Imagination is more important than knowledge *~

Einstein

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

3 posted 2002-03-01 01:51 AM

Paladin~

'Beneath a canopy of the forest deep
A shifting haze of a summer morn
I walk because I can not sleep
Solf rain on dead leaves forlorn'

You've written it ...
and it's the first-step toward releasing the 'old fear'
and the second-step into the 'sunshine'~
Very well done, sir~
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

fractal007
Senior Member

since 2000-06-01

Posts 1958

4 posted 2002-03-02 02:22 AM

Nice poem. I liked the dark ambience, as well as the changing scenes. The transition from the first few lines to the helicopter seemed a bit confusing, but that's just me talking.

Overall, a great read.

"If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh"

-- Magus

IntoTheFlames
Member

since 2003-06-21

Posts 92
Va, USA

5 posted 2003-07-06 09:43 PM

Our minds do wonder quite often don't they? I think you did a great job of describing it:"My mind drifts away into inky shades". Great write!

~*Summer*~

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

6 posted 2003-07-07 05:01 PM

Hopefully it will grow dimmer
with each fresh page...James

scorpio
Member Ascendant

since 2002-10-02

Posts 5178
right...there

7 posted 2003-07-08 07:17 PM

The sunshine beacons...turn a fresh new page...inspired write, Robert..

believe in what your heart feels...

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.