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Teen Poetry #4
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Nightmares
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Nightmares |
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MysticalAngel7 Junior Member
since 2001-02-24
Posts 20 |
This hurt and pain Deep in my soul It's driving me insane I'm out of control What's wrong with me What's up with my life Those depressing dreams That glistening knife Death and Pain Deep in my head Lightening and rain More horror to dread As I fall asleep My fear comes true Promises you said to keep How can I trust you? In a restless state Murder and guilt Done with hate Nothing to be felt The fear doesn't go The horror comes back Night after night I will never relax ** God does not send people to hell, People choose to go to hell ** *For that bright hope at last and that light time have past, and my worldly res [This message has been edited by MysticalAngel7 (edited 02-25-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Carissa Clark - All Rights Reserved | |||
Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Nicely written Carissa.....I thought it was sad though. Like.....you saying you'll never relax.......you know you will though....don't be that negative. Have some hope. Much love here...  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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Elvenblood Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409Maine, USA |
Wow, that's just freaky. Reminds me of ...ME! People have given me death threats for everything from my height to my sexuality. I don't care though, you just have to remember that most people won't actually do anything. "Some men see things as they are and say why. I dream things that never were and say why not." ~RFK |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
MysticalAngel the poem itself is excellent, your situation however is not. "What's wrong with me What's up with my life Those depressing dreams That glistening knife" This I can relate VERY well to. I do hope that you start feeling better. It's not a good way to be living. I'm here for you if you need an ear. ~AF~ "Love makes us poets and the approach of death should make us philosophers." ~ George Santayana |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Yes, I'd say that this is the best of yours I've read so far. The scheme of rhyme is great, and it kind of becomes clumsy and disorganized in the end. I'm assuming this was done so as to reflect the state you were in. Great job. -Allan The unintelligent are merely tools for the intelligent. That would make my house a veritable toolshed. ~~Allan Riverwood |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
I think you've expressed yourself really well Such unfortunate nightmares, hope you sleep better soon You have the skills for writing great. You should foolow the path you're at right now. You are doing really good So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S. |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
this poem was so sad. it was very harsh. i hope all is well. i loved the poem. Regina |
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fractal007 Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958 |
Impressive. I truly hope that you sort your life out. I have never really had nightmares when dealing with stressful situations in life, so I do not know what it is like dealing with your situation. I liked the rhyme scheme too. |
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MysticalAngel7 Junior Member
since 2001-02-24
Posts 20 |
Thanks again for all your comments. If you have read any of my other poetry then you know my mom left me. It's not at all really a depressing poem really. I just kept having dreams that my mom hurt herself or that something happened to my little brother and since I don't know where my mom is or any way of getting ahold of her... I was afraid all this would happen and I wouldn't know. I wasn't really upset about it. But thanks for the replies. - Always... Carissa Neither the angels in heaven above,Nor the demons down under the sea,can ever dissever my soul from the soul, of the beautiful Annabel Lee -E.A.Poe |
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shortilove_03 Junior Member
since 2001-02-15
Posts 20Arkansas, United States |
Your poem is pretty good. Yes, it's the new girl. It did seem kind of sad though. I hope you find your mom. Until then, keep expressing yourself through your writings. =) Shelia |
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