Teen Poetry #4 |
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Rivers and Creeks |
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fozzyozzy Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 336Lessburg Virginia ![]() |
Rivers and Creeks Brilliance had light unscathed Saunters in gentling breezes Had not one but two reflections gazed Rippling pools of dreaming Float somewhere downstream I would walk the shallow waters And wade into sparkling beds Without being told; swept inot current Within different heads I can hide now safe from approachment A silence needing no aristocrats's endorsement Slushing again on an endless river A darkplace where I sleep, sweet, and shiver A palattable sky swirling o'er head Into something gray and dead It's peaceful under these rivers and creeks And frustratingly silent In the darkness my heart unconsiously seeks. ------------------------ The rhyming's screwed up I know. Take it as you(the reader) may "The heart can think of no devotion |
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© Copyright 2001 Sean Michael DeFlora - All Rights Reserved | |||
Meggie1986 Junior Member
since 2001-05-22
Posts 41California |
>>And frustratingly silent >>In the darkness my heart unconsiously seeks. Wow- quoteable! This is another beautiful poem. I think the rhymeing pattern(?) really goes with the poem, and strengthens it. Great job, more soon! *One meets his destiny often in the road he takes to avoid it. |
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Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Well done here. That quote was great....the line that the person above me did......awesome. I really liked it. The poem itself....kind of off in some places, but still a wonderful read. ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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