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Teen Poetry #4

Rivers and Creeks

fozzyozzy
Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 336
Lessburg Virginia

0 posted 2001-06-02 10:52 PM

Rivers and Creeks

Brilliance had light unscathed
Saunters in gentling breezes
Had not one but two reflections gazed
Rippling pools of dreaming
Float somewhere downstream
I would walk the shallow waters
And wade into sparkling beds
Without being told; swept inot current
Within different heads
I can hide now safe from approachment
A silence needing no aristocrats's endorsement
Slushing again on an endless river
A darkplace where I sleep, sweet, and shiver
A palattable sky swirling o'er head
Into something gray and dead
It's peaceful under these rivers and creeks
And frustratingly silent
In the darkness my heart unconsiously seeks.
------------------------
The rhyming's screwed up I know. Take it as you(the reader) may

"The heart can think of no devotion
Greater than being shore to ocean
Holding the curve of one position
Counting an endless repetition"
Robert Fr

Meggie1986
Junior Member

since 2001-05-22

Posts 41
California

1 posted 2001-06-02 10:59 PM

>>And frustratingly silent
>>In the darkness my heart unconsiously seeks.

Wow- quoteable! This is another beautiful poem. I think the rhymeing pattern(?) really goes with the poem, and strengthens it. Great job, more soon!

*One meets his destiny often in the road he takes to avoid it.

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

2 posted 2001-06-03 04:07 PM

Well done here. That quote was great....the line that the person above me did......awesome. I really liked it.
The poem itself....kind of off in some places, but still a wonderful read.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

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