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Raven Skye
Member

since 2001-03-03

Posts 112
.In a House.

0 posted 2001-05-31 07:08 PM

Not the best...haven't been writing very good lately, i'm gonna cry

*me*

Mindless,
Self-Indulgent,
Uncaring girl.
That's what i am.
What I'll always be.

Negleted,
Drowning in misery,
Thoughtless & Abandoned.
That's what i am,
What I'll always be.

Unreasonable,
Piece of drivel,
Unprincipled & profligate
That's what i am
That is me...

*×´¨`·.×*Raven Skye*×´¨`·.×*
"Can't explain the way that I feel. You are the love I never found." -Cold

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2001-05-31 10:52 PM

I really hope you don't feel that way about yourself

You are so much more than that

I'd like to see a poem from you about all the positive things about you! Consider it a challenge......

SEA

fractal007
Senior Member

since 2000-06-01

Posts 1958

2 posted 2001-05-31 10:55 PM

Hm... Not very nice words. This was a rather harsh critique on the self. I think you should do your best at being nice. People aren't expecting you to be some angel or something. You're human.

Good poem, though.

"If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh"

-- Magus

little_krazy_poet
Junior Member

since 2001-05-28

Posts 41

3 posted 2001-06-01 12:48 PM

ok i have a large LARGE problem with people discouraging talented writers from writing what they have in them because that is where REAL writing comes from. well i realy liked the poem and remember write what YOU feel like writing. hope to see more of your poems

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

4 posted 2001-06-01 01:14 AM

"Negleted,
Drowning in misery,
Thoughtless & Abandoned.
That's what i am,
What I'll always be."

i realted to this...great job on writing this

...bye

i'm addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

5 posted 2001-06-02 02:59 AM

Wow this one was so negative. I could just feel the self bashing within this one. Don't be so hard on yourself. Often one's worst critique is one's self. Keep that head up....and if you need to talk then don't be afraid to e-mail me

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

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