Teen Poetry #4 |
You, My Universe |
DreadedLiver Member
since 2001-01-23
Posts 56Alter, Ego |
Another odd style, just want to spice it up a little. You, My Universe: i cannot compare and contrast you (you cannot be contrasted) to seas’ blue but of course (I can compare) you accurately (if I dare) it’ll boggle minds; any of differ ent kinds. features such as, (smile, lips so red) skin and hair; incise in my head you: me: us: (strolling through) lighted lamps, moonshine enhances eyes’ blue -Knightfellow < !signature--> "If you had a choice to believe in yourself, or another person, who would it be?" [This message has been edited by DreadedLiver (edited 01-24-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Jesper A. Knightfellow - All Rights Reserved | |||
jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
i love to see new styles. once again i have to say that ive never seen this style in this forum before. i think its really special to be able to write like that. i loved the idea of how you cant contrast her to anytthing beautiful but you can compare her accurately, beautiful ideas portrayed, IM LOVING THIS STYLE. ~JDR "Is it love in my gut, or piss in my bladder?" -Allan Riverwood |
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IsGona Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723 |
e.e. cummings was your grandfather. wasn't he? I would love to see more of these. They are great. You have a talent here. Nice work ~Jason "Every body has their destiny... I'LL CHOOSE MY OWN ~Hatebreed~ |
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katherine Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365Canberra Australia |
this is really good. i love how it's diferent. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Yea I love E.E.........he's real good and you did very well in his style. Do you have a style of your own, or one that you like writing in other than E.E.? I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
This definitely is different from the rest of the poem styles i've seen here in passions It's intriguing me right now "you: me: us: (strolling through) lighted lamps, moonshine enhances eyes’ blue" beautiful!!! keep posting I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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DreadedLiver Member
since 2001-01-23
Posts 56Alter, Ego |
Well, I can write in sonnet form... I really like this kind of writing because it is so unique to me. I will try writing something else to amuse you and thanks to everyone!! -Knightfellow "If you had a choice to believe in yourself, or another person, who would it be?" |
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