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Teen Poetry #4
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Sorrowful Sorry
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Sorrowful Sorry |
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Angel in Flight Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 381 |
A outcry in the outskirts but I gaze the other way. A child pleas for avail but I retain her at bay A hand reaches out to me but I propulsion it to far how was I to cognize your life I would mar Then when I hypothesized I ran straight to your side but it was to late ...... you had already .... died |
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| © Copyright 2001 Amanda - All Rights Reserved | |||
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
intriguing title i must state sad sad ending tho... i hope the next time your there on time! best wishes ~JDR "Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." -Oscar Wilde |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Powerful poem. When the last line begins and ends such a signifigant event like that, it always takes the reader by surprise. Well done indeed. Eternal life without the darkness isn't life at all- it is a lobotomy. |
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Angel in Flight Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 381 |
Well everyone usually I would say thank you to everyone but I am really in a most disterbing mood. So please do not be upset if I do not respond to your reply. I am very sorry to you (crying) and i am sooo sorry....... [This message has been edited by Angel in Flight (edited 01-11-2001).] |
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Bright_Eyes Junior Member
since 2000-12-22
Posts 29Plymouth, MN |
What a moving poem! The end just totally caught me by suprise and I felt so sad. I'm really sorry...nice writing. ~BECKY |
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Melster Member
since 2000-12-09
Posts 442Brisbane, Qld, Australia |
Great write... the loss of someone soo close is hard, we are all here for you though if you ever need to talk... I hope that you can soon overcome your pain and not regret the last moments... MelZ!! You can't hurt me anymore than I have hurt myself already... |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
you know...you have such a way with your words I mean, i'm relly very impressed with your poems TALENT -- that you obviously have In such short writes you express a mile long road of emotions great write I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Nice one here.....quite sad though....very sad, in fact. Nonetheless it was a nice poem.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Powerfully written ending to this one, and they entire poem is very well written. It is such a sad thing to have someone die, everyone thinks that they shoud have been able to help them, done more. Please share more poems with us. "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
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Angel in Flight Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 381 |
Bright eyes~ Thank you  Melster~ Thank you, And i am fine now Acire~ Thank you so much for what you said... it means so much to me really it does.dopey~ thank you for your comment on my poem Lakewalker~ yes that is soo true. THank you for your reply it is greatly appreciated. Thank you all for your replys ~"Amanda"~ What comes with love are tears of pain. What comes with hate are brighter days~ Amanda |
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