Teen Poetry #4 |
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Narcoleptic Insomniac |
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MoeRocko Member
since 2001-04-25
Posts 166West Virginia |
I can't sleep I can't wake What is this? Am I dreaming? Am I awake? Why must it be like this? Castles made of sand slip into Sea eventually... |
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knightlyshadows Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791obscured vision |
hah lol u dodo *hugs* loves ya muchs cutishness poem ![]() tiff ![]() “A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.” |
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obscurity of cloud Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 294....:::::******:::::.... |
This is neat, it kind of reminds me of "Insomniac Insignia" that i posted yesterday, same number of lines...so let me compliment you on your form, theme, and title! We shouldn't ever collaborate; no one would get any sleep ![]() ![]() "so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost |
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LoveBug![]()
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
Greetings, my fellow West Virginian! This is a very good piece, but perhaps you should look into metimic scheme. Its used in all the geat poems, and it really shows when a poet can master it. Anyway, this piece is still excellent! Thanks for sharing. ![]() "Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli |
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Child of the Stars![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Hahaha....lovin' it! My two fave subjects to think about and learn about. ![]() ~Carly "I'll take in anyone who's taking off their camouflage..." ~Third Eye Blind~Camouflage |
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stace_co2003 Member
since 2001-03-30
Posts 497In a dream world |
that's neat!! lol, it's cute... nice!! ![]() Stace |
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Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I enjoyed the poem....sometimes we are blessed with things unblessed....did that make sense? I don't think so....oh well. Sorry yer going through that. ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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