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Teen Poetry #4
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Anorexia Nervosa
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Anorexia Nervosa |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Yeah...um...I have never written a piece this honest before in my life. I have come to a realisation of some certain things. Please don't be too harsh on this one thanks. ~AF~ At an interview last week, My principal told me I was sick. Told me I had an eating disorder, Told me I had to give it up. Like I would have an eating disorder, I truly love my food. They'll all just jealous that they can't look like me, I have the figure that they all want. If perfection was a human being, that person is me. "You can't stuff around with me, Elizabeth, I know what you are up to." What on earth am I up to? I just like to exercise… So what if I am conscious of what I eat? So what if I don't eat when you see me? I do not have an eating disorder! Today I feel so cold, I think they are tears running down my face. I don't like this realisation, Of seeing what I really am. I'm sick…and yeah I'll admit it. I don't know where I went wrong. I am seeing J-Lo next to me, Her arms are thinner than mine! Reading through this web site, All the signs are there. I do skip meals and complain about my size, Even though I am a size 8. Arguing is my strong point, I do get defensive if questioned, And I do have an obsession with being the thinnest. Why does it hurt when I look at my body? Why do I want to lose weight all the god damn time? Why is it that I hate myself? Why can't I get this under control? I did a test just now, That even says I have an eating disorder. I don't like this realisation, Of seeing what I really am. It's a dream. Some stupid pathetic dream. So many other factors are contributing to this, My environment is why I am like this! Who am I kidding? It's my fault. I have to fix this, And pull myself out of this nightmare. Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Elizabeth Johnson - All Rights Reserved | |||
anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
well..pointed thru this poem...i felt the apin..the sadness that also comes with it...i hope things get better eJ or have...this poem told so much and how you've written it shown me it...great job and keep writing...my friend..  ...?if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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Tamma
since 2000-01-17
Posts 794In His Arms, Harpers Ferry, WV |
OMG AF...This is sad...The guyz @ my school say that I'm anorexic...my biggest thing is that all the females in my family are rather small. But, I too, skip meals and complain about my size 3's not fitting me anymore. Its gotten to the point that I only eat 1 meal a day, and my size 5 jeans are starting to get loose around my waist. I'm not sure If I'm sick myself or if this is just one of my ups and downs things. Good luck...Keep me posted! Those girls on TV don't know that being |
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katherine Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365Canberra Australia |
this is so sad and must be painful to realise and then put into words. hang in there you'll be fine you can get through it. good luck! katie if you don't let them in they can't see the real you |
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obscurity of cloud Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 294....:::::******:::::.... |
This is a really well voiced expression of a good deal of us girls. It took a lot of courage to post this...keep writing! |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Excellent job of telling this, I thought the poem was written very well. I think it really showed your feelings. I hope that you can work through this and be strong at fighting your illness. Thanks for sharing this poem, I hope it can help others. "Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle" Plato. |
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stace_co2003 Member
since 2001-03-30
Posts 497In a dream world |
hey! I know where you are coming from, as I myself have been there. just stay strong...it's a hard thing to get over. well, you never really 'get over' it, but you can get past it. I wish you the best of luck. Stace IF THEY DON'T HAVE CHOCOLATE IN HEAVEN, I AIN'T GOING!!! |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
I've been there to and like people have said..just stay strong...we're all here for you..and thank u for sharing this with us..  |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
this is incredibly powerful writing, this piece really hit me hard. you did a wonderful job expressing yourself and your feelings. this is a hard thing to deal with and you don't have to do it alone. i have lost friends to this, please don't let it go too far. i hope things get better for you, please email me if you need someone to talk to. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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Elusive^ Junior Member
since 2001-05-13
Posts 18dancing fairy land |
my god..this hit home hard. your writing is powerful. though what you're going through is more than powerful.. email me if you want to talk.. ok? ''I'll TAKE a QUIET life..a HANDSHAKE of CARBON monoxide with NO alarms AND no SURPRISES..'' |
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Isabel Galaxia Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733 |
I've never read anything truer. I'm a size 6, down from a size 12. Since last March I've had a "situation." At first everyone told me how stupid I was and that I wasn't going to loose weight, I was just hurting myself. One person told me I wasn't impressing anyone, then proceded to "hate" me later for it. Some people have given up on me, some people have yet to try. A guy today even grabbed my arm and said "You have those big anorexic wrists!" I'm frequently called "Miss Anorexia" by one person. I cannot tell you how many times I've been told to eat, or I was going to die, and how many times I've cried. Through it all of course I smiled, argued, and backed my way out of it. I've warned other people not to start this, not to skip one meal, because it's hell. Living hell. I know exactly how you feel, so if you ever need someone to talk to or just to listen, e-mail me([email protected]). I'm sorry this happened to you Bel |
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vixengrl04 Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495East Haddam, CT |
I thought that this was really heartfelt and truthful. Really sad too. I hope you get the help that you need 2 get ya better soon, and try to remember that beauty is so much more than size. ~*Nikki*~ ~*Of all the millions of people in the world, I'm just me.*~ |
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Allysa
since 1999-11-09
Posts 1952In an upside-down garden |
I'm between a 5/6 and an 8 right now. I only weigh about 115-120 pounds and all my friends (the girls) in my neighborhood weigh between 160-180. Sometimes people, like my ex, Justin, call me anorexic because I don't eat a lot all the time. It's just cause I'm not hungry at that given time. Then other times, my friends get mad because I sometimes eat a lot and I don't gain any weight cause i have a fast metabolism. Anyways, good poem, and know I'm here for you af, we all are. I know you're in a better place and though I cannot see your face, I know you're smiling down on me, saying everything's okay. ~R Kelly (I wish) |
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AngelPoet87 Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 280Indy |
I can't really relate to this one coz I love my food too much but it was still a really good poem and well written. Good to see you writing about it, hopefully it helped to see the truth coming out of your mouth. Well goodluck with everything and keep your chin up, email me if you ever need to talk, kay? Smiles, ali |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
This one really hit me hard. I'm gonna make this short, but please email me if you wanna talk. I have found that talking really does help. *~*Amanda*~* |
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Dana Samples Member
since 2001-04-07
Posts 68 |
hey. i know what its like to deal with eating disorders. i have one myself and have been fighting it for a year. i've lost 48 lbs. and still losing. i love the poem its really great. i just want peolpe to know that its not just about losing weight. it also come from depression and an obsession problem which usually come from the fact that your life is going out of control and you need something to control. a lot of people think that it only has to do with wanting to lose weight. thats not it at all. mine came from depression and the fact that i have the need to control things. i am here at any time anyone feels that they need to talk. the poem was great nonetheless. keep it up. Lots of love, dana |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
I would just like to thank each and every one of you for your heartfelt replies. They truly mean alot to me. Thank you once again. ~AF~ Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
You wrote this in a way in which you just can't escape the power of truth within it. Amazing poem in the sense that it really shows the public what people can face. This is going to be hard but you have to pull through when facing adversity. You can do it liz....MUA!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
Wow truly amazing... the cold blunt facts presented astound the reader and leave he/she speechless trying to grasp the harsh reality that is presented. A sad read, an excellent poem. Hope you get through Mr mr Zu. " The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots" -Thomas jefferson |
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keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
This is really sad. I think realizing that it is a problem is a huge step. I hope things get better for you.This poem is great, and I think it could really help others out who might have the same problem. Good luck. Jon "Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
You already know how I feel... I have replied to this poem a thousand times on MSN, but I want to raise this up a bit so more people can read it. It's a good poem as well.~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
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Chel Senior Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 511Baltimore, MD, USA |
It will be alright. Today someone said I was anorexic. I was hurt, and had to take a second look. What was wrong with me? I don't understand. I felt the pain from the poem when I started to read. I can understand how you feel. This piece was well written and realistic. Keep up the great work. Chel "True friends stab you in the front." |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Just make sure you really aren't Lizzy. Or else I'll go down there and feed you myself  "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Acire, the sweetheart. Sheesh. Great poem here...It's going in my library, fer lotta reasons...Keep it up...surviving, I mean... ~Carly "I'll take in anyone who's taking off their camouflage..." ~Third Eye Blind~Camouflage |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
I just keep wanting to reread this poem. I, too, know what you are going through. I hve been there, bulimic and anorexic, and still am bulimic, sometimes anorexic. Please, if you or anyone else here wants to talk, I'm here. Also, Dana, you are so right. People seem to think that the only reason you have this problem is because of your weight or something. For me, it was a mix of weight and depression, as it is for most people. I want to thank you again for wrting this. :HUGS: to you all. *~*Amanda*~* |
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cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
i hope you get through this....however horrible it may seem right now...the pain of it definately shows through in the poem...and believe me we can feel it...great job on the poem...but know this..anorexia can not just be fought on your own hunny...its not your fault...we're all here for you..if you ever need to talk email me: [email protected] "Life is not long and boring, |
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Elvenblood Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409Maine, USA |
I realize I haven't posted in forever, and it'll be a long time till I ost again probably, but I need to say something on this. I talk to so many different people with problems that anorexia can seem like nothinga t times, but is it - of course not. It's one of the most serious problems that's comon among young people, and I really hope you get someone's help in correcting it. Everyone who reads this that has an eating disorder - get someone to help you help yourself. I realize I'm neve rmuch help to people, but I try to be, and I want people to be happy, so please. No angels in heaven nor demons below the sea, could ever dissever my soul from the soul of the beautiful Annabel Lee |
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