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Girl
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Girl |
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artemis_selene Junior Member
since 2001-05-07
Posts 14virginia |
hi everyone! this is my first post, so please be kind.... Tangled up in this pretty pink dress Covered in ribbons and lace bows My hair matted and dirty from the stress My face scratched from the blows I sit and stare at my cracked reflection Look into its vast emptiness Trying to find a sense of direction Trying to find the cause of my unhappiness It is as if all that I am is my visage It is all that I am allowed to be I am trapped in this mass produced image That is all that you can ever see Bright red lipstick, eyelashes in a curl The plastic shell from which I have tried to hide I am weary of trying to escape the girl The girl that is on the outside. |
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| © Copyright 2001 artemis_selene - All Rights Reserved | |||
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lonely*soul Member
since 2001-04-05
Posts 396east haddam (moodus) ct :) |
inner beauty matters too..awsome first post and  welcome to passions *KiMMiE* |
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Suga_Baby Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380Maine, USA |
 WELCOME TO PASSIONS!! This is a wonderful first post! Hope you stick around -Sara- "A dream is a wish your heart makes while you are fast asleep." |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Welcome! I hope you enjoy your stay here Please check your e-mail for a special greeting! SEA |
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AngelPoet87 Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 280Indy |
Welcome to Passions, I hope you like it here. Really good poem, I hope to see more of your work soon. Keep writing! ~ali 2Good |
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Hacas Junior Member
since 2001-05-05
Posts 25 |
WELCOME TO PASSIONS! Have fun!  "Fight for what you believe in" |
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Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Welcome to Passions!! Whoa very good first post...I can relate tons...You'll learn a lot bout poetry and expression here, I hope you enjoy that kinda stuff! Have tons of fun and smile!~Carly "Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the self-same well from which your laughter rises was often-times filled with your tears." ~Kahil Gibran |
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DragonFang Senior Member
since 2000-03-09
Posts 522Missouri, USA |
Welcome to Passions. Hmmm... think everyones said everything else that needs to be said Hope you enjoy your stay."Sa souvraya niende missian ye." \ |
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Low Man's Lyric Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 236In a dream |
Good first poem, I really enjoyed it and I hope to see more from you. Give her two red roses, each with a note. The first note says "For the woman I love" and the second, "For my best friend." |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Great work! You've caught my eye with your first post, anybody in here will tell you that my approval is not easily won, especially on someone's first post. But you've done it.  So feel special, okay? I love what you describe here, breaking apart from the physical ties that bind us. It's not easy, but give it time. As for the poem, I'd have to say the flow would be improved with a hint more meter to it. Don't know what meter is? Email me, I'll give you a quick overview.  Welcome to Passions in Poetry. I certainly can't wait to see more of you in here reading, replying and sharing with the rest of us! ~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
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vixengrl04 Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495East Haddam, CT |
This is sooooo sad!! Amazing imagery, you have done a great job. Welcome to Passions! And if the rest of your posts are like this one, you'll definitely fit in fine. ~*Nikki*~ ~*Of all the millions of people in the world, I'm just me.*~ |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
Welcome to Passions!! i love the rhyme schee of this and i love the images you portray with this piece, this is an amazing fist post. and you even won allan's approval with it (he says that like it's something we want) kidding allan, of course anyway, this is wonderful writing, i look forward to seeing lots more from you in the future.Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
This is really good....actually awesome.... beauty is everything about you and so on. welcome to passions!!! you'll learn alot as carly already said. Regina "Take a look at my face, there's no price I won't pay |
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Linc
since 2001-03-07
Posts 552The Backstreet Boy |
WELCOME Hey, I loved the poem it's a great start keep them coming -- Linc "Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment." |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
Welcome to Passions Well done with the first post it's great and I hope to see more of them. Mr Zu " The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots" -Thomas jefferson |
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artemis_selene Junior Member
since 2001-05-07
Posts 14virginia |
thanks everyone! i really appreciate your feedback. |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!! As already said, it's the inside that counts hope you enjoy PIP as much as we do thanks for sharing "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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stace_co2003 Member
since 2001-03-30
Posts 497In a dream world |
hey!! great poem!! I'm pretty new here too...actually, I just posted my first as well, but I must say, you did a better job than I did, lol. I hope you stay and I hope to hear from you again. Stace |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
 Welcome to Passions Great job on this first post, I hope you enjoy your time here "Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle" Plato. |
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cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
 WELCOME!!!this was a great first post artemis_selene!! MORE i say!! MORE!! "Life is not long and boring, |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Well done on the poem and Welcome to Passions! I completely enjoyed this poem and look forward to reading more!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Elusive^ Junior Member
since 2001-05-13
Posts 18dancing fairy land |
this poem really is amazing.. you've put it beautifully..wish lots more people acted upon it though.. Welcome to Passions..*curtseys*  ''I'll TAKE a QUIET life..a HANDSHAKE of CARBON monoxide with NO alarms AND no SURPRISES..'' |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
wow!...the imagery was great in this poem...and sorry iw as late...welcome and hope you liked the stay so far and i hope to see more...also thansk for the great read...  ...?if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
Excellent first post. Glad to see you here at passions. This is a great first post. Can't wait till the next... Jon "Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine |
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obscurity of cloud Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 294....:::::******:::::.... |
Very well done! I hope to see much more! "so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
WeLcOmE tO pAsSiOnS This was an amazing first post and related so much to me and my life..I love poems like that!! An-E-way keep those poems comin!!! I cant wait to see more from u |
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knightlyshadows Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791obscured vision |
whoa! first time ive seen somebody get 2 pages for their first post. feel special for it great job on the poem! thought it was great!!!! WELCOME TO PASSIONS tiff “A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.” |
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Godsend_1 Member
since 2001-04-19
Posts 247great state of illinois |
WELCOME i loved this poem while i am not a girl all my best friends are and i kinda know ut ya mean through them great poem hun ben i am what i am and that is all that i am and all that i shall ever be..so deal with it |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
I know I'm a little late on this one But Welcome to Passions. This poem is awesome. Very impressive first post, I must say. The rhyme scheme is excellent. And the content of the poem was amazing. Very powerful. Nice work. I enjoyed this read, and I can't wait to read more.--Marie "You're the girl of my nightmares. |
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