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fozzyozzy
Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 336
Lessburg Virginia

0 posted 2001-04-26 09:11 PM

Colors

Yellow, golden, and bronze
Bring me to sigh
Blue, aqua, and violet
Cause me to cry
Colors flapping in the wind
Colors to tell me where I belong
Colors to tell me I've sinned

Red, Auburn, and blood
Thoughts of war
Green, forest, and flood
Nature no more
Colors, I used to believe
Colors, home I don't have
Colors are now what I need

Black, gray, and dark
Our souls to die
White, empty, and stark
Scenery to disappear
Colors never ever there
Colors now they're without
Colors colors seem not to care
---------------------------------
The first stanza is screwed up because I simply could not find a rhyme. I apologize

"The heart can think of no devotion
Greater than being shore to ocean
Holding the curve of one position
Counting an endless repetition"
Robert Fr

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

1 posted 2001-04-26 09:20 PM

I didn't notice.

This is awesome, Ozz! Seriously, very creative.
~Allan

Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
~Unknown

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

2 posted 2001-04-26 11:37 PM

I liked it too.....well done.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

3 posted 2001-04-27 02:52 AM

same here i "really" liked
great poem..kepp writing

...?

death is not the greatest loss in life. the greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live. -norman cousins

katherine
Member

since 2000-06-10

Posts 365
Canberra Australia

4 posted 2001-04-27 05:57 AM

it's so cool.
i like the first stanza so what if it doesn't rhyme it works.
keep it up
~kate

Life will always go on just remember to stay focused and positive.

vixengrl04
Member

since 2001-04-26

Posts 495
East Haddam, CT

5 posted 2001-04-27 10:33 AM

I like the way you used different colors as like metaphors. It's very interesting and unique and I can honestly say that I've seen a poem like this before! Good job.

~*Nikki*~

~*Of all the millions of people in the world, I'm just me.*~

banburycross
Senior Member

since 2001-03-27

Posts 946
viginia

6 posted 2001-04-28 04:04 PM

This is really awsome writing, i like this a lot. the style was great and i thought the first stanza was fine. great job, keep writing.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

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