Teen Poetry #4 |
Beauty games |
chasing rain Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737Canada |
Crystal eyes, full of lies And hair made out of gold. Pure white skin, rounded chin Ears full of stories told. Rosy cheeks, she softly speaks The wind becomes her voice. Lips of red, but misled Her mother had no choice. Striding here, posing there Her skirts go up in flames. Child gone, she must live on Through the beauty games. ========== I don't like this one...bleh. But anyways... |
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© Copyright 2001 chasing rain - All Rights Reserved | |||
obscurity of cloud Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 294....:::::******:::::.... |
very interesting! i really like the first line extra expecially Great message, of course. "so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost |
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Love's Addiction Member
since 2001-06-21
Posts 57all around you |
how could u not like this ? i thought it was great! keep it up please! if love wants me, then it can come find me |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
there is a lot of meaning behind this poem...made me think about some things...i liked how you wrote it...great poem ...bye Leah im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you? |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
After reading through this poem a few times, it left me really thinking about the meaning behind this poem. I really enjoyed this... there's a lot of emotion and power put into this. The flow and rhyme scheme was excellent! Awesome post, Leah. This poem rocks. --Marie "Well the sun is slowly sinking down, but the moon is slowly rising... so this old world must still be spinning 'round. And I still love you." -James |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
This wasn't your best. I didn't like it much. You've written so much better Leah, but it wasn't horrible. I liked the style, there was just something missing. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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chasing rain Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737Canada |
I know, which is why i didn't like it... But no matter. Va pensiero sull' ali dorate... |
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