Teen Poetry #4 |
Taking My Feelings Away |
~sugarpie313~ Member
since 2000-09-14
Posts 375Maine, USA |
Feelings all packaged Tied up with a pretty bow, Put a stamp on the corner of it And send them out to go. Far away they are taken Never to be seen again, Not knowing where they're going Or where they might have been. Now that my feelings are gone I can't express them right, It hurts me that I can't do this On this lovely summer night. I want to tell you that I like you And that my feelings are strong, But now that they have been sent away It seems like to say that would be wrong. You tell me that you like me a lot And have since the first day But I can't tell you the same For it was fear that took my feelings away. < !signature--> *...Remember your roots, my friend they're right down below, because heroes come and heroes go...* - Creed [This message has been edited by ~sugarpie313~ (edited 01-17-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Valerie - All Rights Reserved | |||
Pixie-Babe03 Member
since 2000-08-29
Posts 387Central Maine |
grrreat poem chickie!! i looove it.. i bet FNB would too lol atleast your boyfriend lieks your poetry... i wonder if mine would :รพ lata -=Love starts with a SMILE, grows with a KISS, and ends with a TEAR=- |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Hey, I liked this piece! Don't be afraid to open up to this person, now that they have done so for you! -Allan |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Nice one here........hope things go well in the end. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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Angel in Flight Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 381 |
Fear can be a bad or wonderful thing to have you must learn how to use it correctly. And with fear also comes faith. Keep the faith my friend and do what you wish to do. I know you will pull through it in the end. Great peom ~Amanda~ To do anyting LESS then your BEST is to SACRIFICE the GIFT!!! |
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litle_krazy_poet Member
since 2001-01-17
Posts 71 |
well i'm not the best at giving advice; but loved the poem. and heal your life |
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luvnkris Member
since 2000-08-31
Posts 144Perth, Australia |
hey i realli luved this one! it's a true think for a lot of us - not being able to express feelings and all that jazz! but hey if he said he likes you, then go for it!! anyways, i wanna read more of ya poems!! Luv always Jo xoxo * never live a second without being grateful for all you have around you* |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Very good job on this one! I like the way it is written, the first stanza was excellent "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
wow!!! that is good simple but very effective idea of expressing your feelings if you really like the guy, don't let anything get in the way of you and him thanks for the splendid read I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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CareBear3 Junior Member
since 2000-11-20
Posts 39New Hampshire |
I like this one, great job, the rhyme scheme is cool, unique. Fear unfortunetly masks alot of feelings, cause it is usually the first feeling. But just remember first is always the one you should listen to! Great job. "In great moments life seems neither right nor wrong but something greater it seems inevitable" ~Kelley |
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CareBear3 Junior Member
since 2000-11-20
Posts 39New Hampshire |
sorry to double post, editing my last one, haha cause I messed up, I meant to say first is NOT always the one you should listen to! Sorry bout that..great job. "In great moments life seems neither right nor wrong but something greater it seems inevitable" ~Kelley |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
This is such a good poem!! i wish i could send my feelings away forever but i just ignore them instead...i really liked this one a lot =o) |
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GirlsBestFriend Member
since 2000-12-27
Posts 71Planet Earth |
nice one! where did u get that idea about sending your feelings from?! hehe good luck! ~lotsa luv "Isn't it funny how to the world you are nothing? But then to one person..you're the world" |
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The Lost Supertone Member
since 2001-01-20
Posts 74Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada |
Man I'd almost not want to reply since you got so many already (kidding) I thought this was a really cool poem. It's got a very interesting idea behind it. And I could relate to it personaly. I think you did a real good job. if your other work is anything like this one I think I shall have to start reading it. |
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