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Teen Poetry #4
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undaunting defender
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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undaunting defender |
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emptyness Member
since 2000-03-09
Posts 95mobile,Ala,USA |
All day I set up walls of thick hard wood in sets of two All night did I watch over you Till dawn I kept the watch fires burning For the beasts of the wood are forever watching and learning And this vigil watch will I keep forevermore So that you wont be scared any more "Cogito ergo sum"-I think, therefore I exist |
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| © Copyright 2001 emptyness - All Rights Reserved | |||
Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I thought you did well on this one. Keep it up because I liked this one and I'm hoping to see more soon!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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UnPumpkin Junior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 18 |
Bravo, mon ami. J'adore. J'adore toi. |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Good job. The rhyme at the end was a bit redundant though. Mais, j'adore aussi.  ~Allan If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
This one was good... Keep posting, I would like to read more. And Allan was right, the rhyme scheme could change in the end. --Marie I never thought that you would ever be the one to let me down. I guess that just goes to show how wrong I always am. |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
ohhhh, that was good. excellent job on this one my friend...i applaud  "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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