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Dark Enchantress
Senior Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 1258
meet Morgana

0 posted 2001-03-25 09:39 PM

Certainly not one of my best by far, but a poem nevertheless. Just try not to laugh too much.

Within my soul lies no sanctity,
It creeks and aches with the unknown
and the wailing of years burned
I search for myself in words
and analyze all the rhymes
But still no answer is found
The emptiness remains the same
Only now it burns with fury
Fury that washes over my eyes
and stains them as it passes
So that even on the sunny days
my vision is of darkness

and in the end
we still pretend
the time we spend
not knowing when
we're finally free
and you could be
-NIN "The Wretched"

Angel of Darkness

[This message has been edited by Dark Enchantress (edited 03-25-2001).]

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

1 posted 2001-03-25 09:45 PM

This was just fine. I think you did quite well here, not yer best but still a good poem.
Hope to read more!!!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

DancinQueen

Senior Member

since 2000-07-29

Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA

2 posted 2001-03-25 09:53 PM

this was awesome

Great job

*dq

¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

3 posted 2001-03-26 01:09 AM

Yeah, it wasn't so bad. I can see what it was lacking though.

Keep it up.
~Allan

If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

4 posted 2001-03-26 07:34 PM

This is very good! I liked it a lot... Nicely done.

--Marie

I never thought that you would ever be the one to let me down. I guess that just goes to show how wrong I always am.

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

5 posted 2001-04-04 06:26 PM

You have to be kidding me. This is awesome. I LOVE IT!!!

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

banburycross
Senior Member

since 2001-03-27

Posts 946
viginia

6 posted 2001-04-05 08:17 AM

well i don't know what you thought was wrong with this one but i thought it was really well written. i especially liked the ending tothis one, good work

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

Linc

Senior Member

since 2001-03-07

Posts 552
The Backstreet Boy

7 posted 2001-04-05 12:48 PM

Hey,

Yeah it was not your best but good either way. Until your next poem

-- Linc

"Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment."

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