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Open Poetry #12
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If You Were Here
| Open Poetry #12 |
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If You Were Here |
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spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA 
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If you were here For me to show The faded mist Of passions glow The scent that fills This dreary air The rising heat A glaring stare The feel of raindrops Falling down The naked thoughts A chilling sound Fantasy waits This thunderous night Erupting dreams By fire light The flicker of The candles flame Hearts in beat No feel for pain Consumption of Your body’s need To feel desire On which I feed And driven to This very place To feel the lips I’d love to taste The fire of That very kiss Dreams once had Now in remiss If you were here For me to show These words Would be in vain. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Richard Rendall - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Wow..........I am truely impressed at this wonderful piece. The flow and the content combine to speak loudly but smoothly. This one is one to keep so it goes into my library. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
made me smile on an awful night...gotta love ya for that...beautiful, just beautiful... |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
This is wonderful Rich...your words just keep getting more and more powerful...Im loving watching you grow |
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WinterTalon Member
since 2001-01-14
Posts 141Brooksville, KY, USA |
Flow, flow, flow! Loved it! One of those poems with awesome content as well as one you LOVE to read! ~The hardest thing is watching the one you love... love someone else.~ |
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Saunni Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777West Virginia |
What a cool piece! I loved it! Sauni Sauni :) Have you ever known the color grey when the nighttime finds you weak I have, I've walked that road each time; that's where my angel sleeps |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
The flicker of The candles flame Hearts in beat No feel for pain Consumption of Your body’s need To feel desire On which I feed And driven to This very place To feel the lips I’d love to taste The fire of That very kiss Dreams once had Now in remiss If you were here For me to show These words Would be in vain. ============== nothing here is in vain... all the emotions are felt in your expression and presentation very cool write. When to the sessions of sweet silent thought, I summon up remembrance of things past ... I sigh the lack of many a thing I sought. ~Shakespeare~ |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Spiked~ 'If you were here For me to show These words Would be in vain' Muchly enjoyed. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(sigh) Oh how romantic! Yes, you would love her like no other if she was here, which she soon will be in your arms to share your beautiful heart with. (sigh) Excellent poem, my friend, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Lady Lightning Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 422Kentucky |
WOW Rich, Just WOW!!! This is WONDERFUL.... Each time I read you it gets better and better...  There were so many lines in this one I wanted to pull out , but after thinking about it, I think I would have copied them all..hehe.. Thanks for a precious read..Loved it, much.. Hugs ~LL~ The way to love anything is to realize it might be lost. author unknown |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
such a spell you weave with bewitching words...............so enchanting. Helen |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Nicely done Rich..great rhythm.. ~V~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
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Poeminister Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862Regina SK; Canada |
Excellent. I love the way this flows. Nicely penned. Poeminister |
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spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA |
I thank you all so very much.was written from the heart and appreciated from the same. thanks Rich |
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Rosebud1229 Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813North Carolina |
very nice, and so romantic |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
SPIKED, this is an unforgettable read one that I shall thread to library for more enjoyment in days ahead... Thank you PoetFriend for this most endearing poem you have shared *~coco~* |
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spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA |
Thank you rosebud Coco As always I get the most complimentary and excited replies from you. Thank you very much Rich |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Rich~ SO beautiful....... "The feel of raindrops Falling down The naked thoughts" Love this part best -SEA |
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spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA |
Thank you Sea much appreciated. Rich |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Oh BRAVO Rich, great piece of writing...well done ~HUG~ Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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aurora rain Member
since 2000-11-15
Posts 90 |
i'm quite sure you won't mind hearing once more how beautiful and romantic that poem is. nice job... |
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spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA |
Thank you Tracie Aurora no I don't mind and am quite please to hear it Rich |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Romantic and beautiful... I enjoyed the read! *S* |
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spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA |
Thank you Suthern.  |
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