Open Poetry #12 |
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Senseless Absence |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
yesterday, I walked to the edge of logic... stretched it as far as it would go, but still, it didn’t make any sense... why aren’t you here? today, I looked at my reflection in the water... even swirled it around to distort the picture, but, still, I did not understand... why was my face the only one staring back at me? tonight, I tried counting the countless stars... even grabbed a few for my heart’s shine, still it didn’t add up... dear love, where are you? I try to rhyme...I attempt to reason; I think it to death...I completely ignore it; all is absolute madness, my precious... just ease this chaos...pull me close and bridge this distance. -kh 03/19/01 to be with you... |
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Mistletoe Angel![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(tears falling down my cheeks) Oh dear friend, I can feel such pain and loneliness in this poem! I am so sorry to hear of your emptiness. I feel that way a lot too, for I still haven't found my first love. But I do know that everyone has a true love in this world, and you will definitely find your significant other. I pray with all my heart that you find all the love and light your heart longs for. You have such a beautiful heart, dear friend, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Mabel A. Dilley Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 859Seattle, WA, USA |
Distance is like a stone beneath the water. The pieces keep floating up for years. A very yearning poem and one that tells of lonleliness rather than aloneness. I loved the part when you distorted the image staring back at you in the water. Good writing. "I am not now that which I have been." |
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JLR Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785 |
Really like the whole poem, but especially the last verse. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
tonight, I tried counting the countless stars... even grabbed a few for my heart’s shine, still it didn’t add up... dear love, where are you? I try to rhyme...I attempt to reason; I think it to death...I completely ignore it; all is absolute madness, my precious... just ease this chaos...pull me close and bridge this distance. =============================== so many questions poetically pondered... very cool write sp .. love the inner conflict...the yen and yang of this. "tonight, I tried counting the countless stars... even grabbed a few for my heart’s shine," love the imagery and premise in this line.. way cool ![]() great writing ... keep on trying to find reason in the rhyme ![]() We wish ourselves beautiful, |
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kitkat Senior Member
since 2000-01-11
Posts 878Nova Scotia |
My tears fall for you. I understand the feeling in this poem. {{hugs}} |
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walker Member Elite
since 2001-02-11
Posts 2240Florida |
I feel for you, my friend. Well expressed! A quarter of a century must pass, for the writer to understand what and why he writes. |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
Noah: oh, my friend...thank you for your sympathy...but it isn't exactly emptiness...I do have a loved one, but he happens to be far away right now, so it isn't THAT bad, I guess...but I do appreciate your kind words! Thank you!! ![]() Julian: thank you, my friend, for your wonderful reply! I am glad you liked this! ![]() JLR: thanks so much! Glad you enjoyed this!! ![]() JM: hey you! yes, quite the ponderings, indeed! this is actually something that popped into my head at around 4 in the morning...I just woke up and couldn't ignore it...now THAT hasn't happened in a while! ![]() ![]() kitkat: thanks for the hugs! I am glad you could stop by! ![]() walker: thank you, my friend, for your reply...I am glad you liked it!! ![]() sp ![]() to be with you... |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Such powerful yearning... so well written! *S* |
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