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Open Poetry #12
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PoeticKnight
Senior Member
since 2000-01-20
Posts 1144
New Orleans, LA

0 posted 2001-03-17 11:24 AM


The sun appeared blood red just above the cradle of the Earth
Colored with the stains of innumerable sin
Catches my eyes at that slanted angle in this quiet place
It calls to me, and pulls me deeper within
And a black bird flies across its crimson tinted face
So alone and seemingly without a sense of direction
Forlorn in its flight through the still morning air
It was with this bird that I turned my eyes for inspection
Realizing in a momentary shudder of pure and utter despair
How the dawning of day, if looked at in a different light
Can be such a similar scene, identical in all compare,
As the red sun lowering itself for the coming of night



© Copyright 2001 J.M. Landry - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2001-03-17 11:25 AM


Bravo!

Jellybean King
Member
since 2001-03-07
Posts 153
Jelly, Bean
2 posted 2001-03-17 12:29 PM


Stark, beautiful imagery:

"The sun appeared blood red just above the cradle of the Earth"

...and I loved this line:

"And a black bird flies across its crimson tinted face"

These lines are very thought provoking, and capture the mindset and emotions of the observer so well:

"Realizing in a momentary shudder of pure and utter despair
How the dawning of day, if looked at in a different light
Can be such a similar scene, identical in all compare,
As the red sun lowering itself for the coming of night"

Thanks for the great read!

Jellybean King

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

3 posted 2001-03-17 12:30 PM


The sun appeared blood red just above the cradle of the Earth
Colored with the stains of innumerable sin
Catches my eyes at that slanted angle in this quiet place
It calls to me, and pulls me deeper within
And a black bird flies across its crimson tinted face
=====================
Realizing in a momentary shudder of pure and utter despair
How the dawning of day, if looked at in a different light
Can be such a similar scene, identical in all compare,
As the red sun lowering itself for the coming of night
=======================

"the cradle of the Earth"

"Colored with the stains of innumerable sin"
(very cool line of thought and imagery)

"Can be such a similar scene, identical in all compare,
As the red sun lowering itself for the coming of night"


once again the words poetic intelligence,
depth, and intensity come to mind.
impressive imagery in this reflective poetic revelation.
I'll echo Suns "Bravo"


We wish ourselves beautiful,
we cry in the night.
Its not the love you fear ...
its the fall from the height.
~Edwin McCain~

PoeticKnight
Senior Member
since 2000-01-20
Posts 1144
New Orleans, LA
4 posted 2001-03-17 01:03 PM


Thank you all most kindly. Especially sunshine for the Bravo...and JM for the ditto Bravo. *L*
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
5 posted 2001-03-17 01:59 PM


PoeticKnight~
Wonderful image-laden writing here !
A pure mood-altering piece.
Thank you.
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
6 posted 2001-03-19 10:48 AM


(applause) *S* This is excellent!
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