Open Poetry #12 |
Where Mountains Rise |
Trillium
since 2001-03-09
Posts 12098Idaho, USA |
For the nature's majesty challenge. Where mountains rise to awesome heights And strange aurora gifts the nights, In colored ribbons, twisting high, To unheard tempos in the sky, It's there that magic seems to dwell And casts an ancient, feral spell. Upon some tall ledge, with a view, We camp and watch the whole night through. Absorbing beauty all around And listening to hear each sound That drifts upon the chilly air. The cougar in his rocky lair, That screams defiance to the dark. The coyotes howl and sometimes bark And now and then an eerie cry When hunting owls go ghosting by. We know that many share this space, Though we may never see their face, Or hear them passing near at hand. Some are a wary, silent band, But we can feel the presence there Of all the creatures that must share The beauty and the mystery, Where mountains rise, majestically! Previously published on The Typewriters.com [This message has been edited by Trillium (edited 03-15-2001).] |
||
© Copyright 2001 Betty Lou Hebert - All Rights Reserved | |||
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Wow...is like a painting...I could almost hear cicadas! Truly a tranquil read. |
||
walker Member Elite
since 2001-02-11
Posts 2240Florida |
Makes me want to be there. Picture perfect! A quarter of a century must pass, for the writer to understand what and why he writes. |
||
Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
Your descriptive phrases as are always, wonderful. Joyce |
||
Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Trillium~ I felt a spiritual lifting with this lovely piece. 'It's there that magic seems to dwell And casts an ancient, feral spell.' And the shadows of the great creatures of the past ... mark the trail for the existing creatures of the night. I really, really like this. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
||
Trillium
since 2001-03-09
Posts 12098Idaho, USA |
Serenity, Walker, Joyce and Marge: Thank you one and all for the nice comments. I'm glad you liked the poem. Betty Lou Hebert |
||
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Where mountains rise to awesome heights And strange aurora gifts the nights, In colored ribbons, twisting high, To unheard tempos in the sky, It's there that magic seems to dwell And casts an ancient, feral spell. ============= your imagery is as superb as your cadence is... this is wonderful writing well done Trillium take care jm We wish ourselves beautiful, we cry in the night. Its not the love you fear ... its the fall from the height. ~Edwin McCain~ |
||
Trillium
since 2001-03-09
Posts 12098Idaho, USA |
Thank you Janet Marie. I appreciate your nice comments! Betty Lou Hebert |
||
Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Trillium, I enjoyed your poem very much. Your critique note says "Be honest," so I will ask you a question. Have you considered formatting this piece without capitalizing each line's first word? Doing so might allow for a smoother, more easily-read verse. It is a lovely poem and deserves every opportunity to shine. (o: Thanks for it! Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
||
Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
very nice... enjoyed muchly. |
||
Trillium
since 2001-03-09
Posts 12098Idaho, USA |
Hi Mike: Thanks for reading and commenting. Glad you liked the poem Meadowmuse: Thanks for your comments also. I have a hang-up about punctuation I think, but I will consider what you say and try it. Thanks! Betty Lou Hebert |
||
WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Simply beautiful Betty! A wonderous picture you've painted with your words. <*\\\>< |
||
Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
This is a very beautiful piece with lovely imagery....I enjoyed this brilliant poem....take care! Nathan |
||
kitkat Senior Member
since 2000-01-11
Posts 878Nova Scotia |
Very nice. Makes me want to be there on the legde just to listen to all the sounds and see the sights |
||
Trillium
since 2001-03-09
Posts 12098Idaho, USA |
WhtDove - thanks for commenting! Glad you enjoyed reading it. Nathan - Thank you for such nice comments. Betty Lou Hebert |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |