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Open Poetry #12
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a small seduction
| Open Poetry #12 |
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a small seduction |
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Packratmike Senior Member
since 2001-02-25
Posts 632California, USA 
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a small seduction she saunters in nature’s rich sun-lit garden nodding and winking her buckeye-brown eyes at the blushing blossoms timid petals unfold and offer a prismatic path sweetly scented with their enticing spring perfumes she stops to drink and the rainbow foliage undulates seductively about her while a familiar warm wind tickles at tiny hairs on the back of her neck satiated and content she wanders home unknowingly carrying morrow’s life the garden rests in the still of darkness awaiting nature’s sun-lit child "HEY, DON'T THROW THAT AWAY, I MIGHT NEED IT SOMEDAY!!!" Packratmike |
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| © Copyright 2001 Mike Powers - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Krawdad Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597 |
In spite of my very jaded opinion about this "creature", I can see the idyllic pleasure of this scene. Nice write, Packrat. krawdad |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
oh...and I thought I saw FAIRIES!!!! CLAPPING MY HANDS FOR TINKERBELL. lovely, you truly did just describe a garden fairy!  |
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Saxoness
since 1999-07-18
Posts 1102Texas |
IloveitIloveitIloveit! "Glory remains unaware of my neglected dwelling where alone I sing my tearful song which has charms only for me." |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
well, I wasn't sure when I first read, but serenity hit it on the head...love this... |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
packrat, such a vivid and stunning write. write on Kethry Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen. |
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Packratmike Senior Member
since 2001-02-25
Posts 632California, USA |
krawdad... When I first began writing this poem I had intentions of simply describing a young lady's stroll through a huge flowery garden. "a prismatic path" was at that time my description of an array of various colorful flowers surrounding her on all sides. Then, I realized it could be read completely different by inserting the last stanza. I envisioned an insect ("creature") or even a Fairy. Whatever the reader sees her as is what she is. All in all, I see how this poem could be interpretted in so many different ways and THAT's what made it a jewel for me. Glad you enjoyed it. ********************************** serenity.....a fairy works here, i suppose a caterpillar would too.LOL ********************************** Saxoness...thankyouthankyouthankyou ********************************** jellybeans....'sok...I'm still not sure! Thanks "HEY, DON'T THROW THAT AWAY, I MIGHT NEED IT SOMEDAY!!!" Packratmike |
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Packratmike Senior Member
since 2001-02-25
Posts 632California, USA |
Thanks Kethry |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Mike--I know I have walked this garden before...mine had a few weeds, it's true, but still...I think it's me. Very much enjoyed the read...thanks! |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
Oh yes..I enjoyed reading this. The feeling and images spoke to me in the way that dreams seem to.  |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
It matters not just what I see A girl, a faerie, or a bumblebee Tis a pleasure to stroll in your garden so fair To smell the flowers, and feel the breeze in my hair To give in to the temptation just to sit and to dream To bask in the warmth of a hot summer sunbeam And perhaps catch a glimpse of that mystery A girl, a faerie, or a bumblebee.... |
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KokoStewartKoomoa Senior Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 580Waikiki, Hawaii |
This sensual piece was exquisitly penned with an artful mind and a wonderful muse! I loved this poem! Passion,imagination and intellect running together... Poetry in motion~~~ Aloha with warmest regards, Koko |
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DreamLess Member
since 2001-02-28
Posts 92 |
hey, i really liked what you wrote.. |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
I think the fairie thing works real good here......it's a beautiful portrait you've painted for us....... SEA |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
well, since you said 'sok....I reread what I wrote and realized that I didn't accurately portray my feelings on this....I did really like it!...I just wasn't sure how to pinpoint it...I felt all the things you described, first it felt like a girl, then...a creature...then just sort of magical....but when serenity said 'fairy'...I just smiled and I knew, that's what my mind saw too, I just hadn't gotten to the word yet.....anyway...I like the way you write...am glad you are posting here |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
....thank goodness poetry is open to various interpretations....I pictured a doe.... |
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Packratmike Senior Member
since 2001-02-25
Posts 632California, USA |
I am soooooo pleased that this poem spoke to you all the way it did. Martie...you may walk in this garden anytime you like. Just don't bring those weeds with you..thanks. ************************ Temptress...dreamlike and maybe even a bit mysterious. Glad you enjoyed. ************************ Paula...Again, you flatter me. That poem is fantastic! Thanks! ************************ Koko...Thank you...at times I wondered if it was getting a bit too sensual. Guess not. ************************ Dreamless...hey, thank you! ************************ Sea...Thank you, Sea. ************************ jellybeans...A poem that leaves you with questions, a mystery, keeps you thinking about it long after you read it. Glad you liked it and thanks. ************************ Sunshine..."buckeye-brown eyes" sorta gives you that impression. That works. Thanks "HEY, DON'T THROW THAT AWAY, I MIGHT NEED IT SOMEDAY!!!" Packratmike |
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