Are all knights in shining armor? (well yuh but hehe)

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wayoutwalt
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)

0 posted 2001-02-23 12:22 PM

There, in sunbeam, stands a savior
Sword of knight; he promises
As he nears I begin to doubt
He draws his blade and slashes me
He says forever I’ll live without

I tell him he is quite mistaken
Does not recall the falling sunbeam
That glided o’er the crystal waves
Compared to this upon his shoulder
The sun sets soft on mossy graves

He's too strong I must succumb
I kneel and praise upon his glory
He lays the blade and cuts my ear
Where enchanted forest bears me sway
The blood that flows of crimson tears

Ivory chalice might passion-filled
For I refused it at his knee
I pressed upon him to be my savior
He laughed and drank, the swine!
How I’d not share in his behavior?

I drug his armor; we enclosed
Although I drank not of his passion
His eyes were muddied. Fists were swinging.
He was making bedroom eyes at me
From the trees I heard blissful singing

This sword is heavy, I understand
As he turns to follow youthful merry,
A brute could only bear such a weight
I heft it upon my hip and swing
Maybe a savior is such his fate

The sunbeam kiss on soldier’s grave
And in my basket there’s a chalice
In the forest I sit softly humming
To the tune of sweet sunbeam’s song
I bid for anyone worthy, coming

I bid the cup not run o’er with blood
Of my heart I cherished in his hands
I close my eyes to spill and prepare it
My mind, my soul, my last words, I swing
“You’ll never hurt again I swear it!”

[This message has been edited by wayoutwalt (edited 02-23-2001).]

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

1 posted 2001-02-23 12:31 PM

Walt, one thing that does not change is your versatility..this is a very powerful piece of writing...let me be the first to say "well done"...

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

2 posted 2001-02-23 12:48 PM

My goodness, Walt ~
When you dig in - you really dig in !
This is exceptional.
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Kethry
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-29

Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

3 posted 2001-02-23 06:08 AM

Wow, an unhappy but just ending. Well done!
Kethry

Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen.

wayoutwalt
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)

4 posted 2001-02-23 09:02 AM

thanking you all for the kind replies thanky

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

5 posted 2001-02-23 02:06 PM

very different read, but I certainly enjoyed it's depth

and form

~Wynter

"The worst prison would be a closed heart".
...Pope John Paul II

Alicat
Member Elite

since 1999-05-23

Posts 4094
Coastal Texas

6 posted 2001-02-23 02:43 PM

Whoa Walt....this one took me a few readings. For some reason, I saw a mentor-type person, like a father figure, worshipped by a child or student, only to find the base depravity lurking just beneath his fragile eggshell hide.

In another thought runs the feeling this this one is a very poetic and moving slam agaist the White Knights, also known in some circles as the Ku Klux Klan, and the refusal to follow such blind, hateful ideology.

Either way, if'n I'm not completely off base and simply spittin in the wind, this was one excellent piece of work, Walt. I are amazed!

Alicat

“It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most
intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.” Charles Darwin

Voiceless
Senior Member

since 2001-02-19

Posts 686
Under the stars upon the wind

7 posted 2001-02-23 02:53 PM

What can i say...
It is superb!
A poem that you hate to see end.

~*Peachy Be*~

Meadowmuse
Member Elite

since 1999-12-27

Posts 3263

8 posted 2001-02-23 08:12 PM

Walt, you developed your theme further than I had anticipated, and it worked. Depth and intrigue is what I read. Very nice! (o:

Claire

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau

cruz
Member

since 2000-07-18

Posts 282
Dallas,Texas USA

9 posted 2001-02-24 08:28 PM

Youve taken me into this forest setting where only 2 people exist. Bloody passion is expressed more ways than 1. The wounded becomes the attacker and is left all alone in the confused world. I have to say Im still absorbing your spilled beans and cant get enough. I like the dragging of the armor, mossy graves, muddied eyes and blissful singing. So, I guess all knights are not in shining armor.

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

10 posted 2001-02-24 09:08 PM

Walt~ this is just amazing........excellent writing!!

SEA

wayoutwalt
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)

11 posted 2001-02-24 10:49 PM

ya'll been real nice thanky

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

12 posted 2001-02-25 05:59 AM

Walty, so much depth in this poem, oh and such wonderful imagery.

"His eyes were muddied"

I loved this line so much, it portrayed an image of this man in my mind and it was like WOW.

Well Done Walty buddy

Maree

elisaseyes
Member

since 1999-07-15

Posts 196
fort worth texas

13 posted 2001-02-25 09:01 PM

Walt-o-Meal, I really love this. (grin)

NC
Member

since 2001-02-20

Posts 89

14 posted 2001-02-25 10:11 PM

a great read!
love the way
you've done this one

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