Open Poetry #12 |
In your Mind |
Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
In your Mind I saw me in your mind yes you thought I was this while I thought you were great at first while you were being you and I was being me why did you ever think a self of your making I could ever be… all I wanted was for you to be happy all you wanted was to be Professor Higgins only you did not know what you were all about and you did not know that I knew Pygmalion so well so you took your preferences and foisted them on me and worst of all… I let you… for I had loved you and wanted to be your everything even at the expense of losing myself… so that the me you fell in like with and in love with became a distant star that only shimmered in the blackest of nights, and then, then, only if you looked very very hard… sad so sad to have to think twice before spontaneously laughing to have to watch my step before skipping to hide my real thoughts, saying “nothing” because the truth would hurt… to be told my age when I know my age but age is nothing other than a state of mind and my mind is not going where yours is… I will not languish in this me that you think I should be any longer… and if you cannot live with the me that wants to come back and laugh and skip and tell it as I see it… the person that you fell in like with in the beginning well, truth hurts… I’m sorry I’m sorry we wasted our time or that I thought I could be the person you wanted, when I was giving up so much of who I really am… and I am sad that you can not revel in my exultant nature but you shall not cast stones at my personality any longer… no… you did not learn what the Professor learned no…. I saw me in your mind yes you thought I was this while I thought you were great while you were being you and I was being me why did you ever think a self I could never be… as all I wanted was for you to be happy in loving the me that you first saw and which now makes her return…. and I will now again see the me in your mind…. even if you leave while I laugh with life and skip to songs and believe that good will happen yes, I saw me in your mind ~ ~ once ~ write with grace, all others lose face; "Jo was very tall, thin, ... and reminded one of a colt..." LMA |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
"for I had loved you and wanted to be your everything even at the expense of losing myself…" I remember living like this............ I remember the trying to be what he thought I should be, the "me" he created in his mind....... I'm so glad I'm not there now this is a really amazing poem....... SEA |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
love is tricky thing, huh? hmmm.... i like the way you use one words stanzas to make a point.... (hehe... i do that, too)... anyway, a strong write here which sounds honest as if based on actual events. nicely done. thanks for the read |
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ATelamon Member
since 2001-02-06
Posts 328Purgatory, Last Staircase, Up |
You take on so many of the issues that are the heart of why "relationships" fail. The all too real chance of losing oneself in trying to be what the object of one's affectione would want. This is od course the most dangerous and sel-destructive trap of all. Finding and being oneself is hard enough in this mass-media world. Throw in trying to be something you are not and you qiute literally lose indentity. We all do these things, at one time or another. yet it never ceases to amaze how people believe "I can change..He/She." Or "if He/She is loved enough, or secure enough..." the etcs go on inifnatum. I think you have come to the much better conclusion- "If you love me, whwy would you WANT to change me." There is an over analysis if ever I saw one. Yet the lessons herein are ones we ALL can either learn or be reminded of. Well done indeed. My Compliments AT "Time is merely change. It neither enslaves nor determines us. It is instead our opportunity for self-definition" |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
to have to think twice before spontaneously laughing to have to watch my step before skipping to hide my real thoughts, saying “nothing” because the truth would hurt… wow, the whole thing just writes my marriage...sigh...cept the love part...I don't think I ever loved him...and that makes the distant twinkling of myself even sadder.....at least love has reason....and sigh...I babble...thanks for the read I love the way you wrote this |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
Thank you all for reading so much into this...and for responding so thoroughly.... |
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