Open Poetry #12 |
Emotional Day Dead Ahead |
Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Emotional Day Dead Ahead Thought I’d go me to the beach Just to touch, just to reach A bit of calm A taste of clam And get to happy as fast I as can… Not to be, not to be Terror hunted deep the sea Not in form of physical waste Not in great nor terrible haste But silent, silent, drew the wave From where pleasure I would save… Here on this my one hand Where I could hold the moon This early, early morn Came with me emotions Tarred, feathered, scorned… Here on this other hand Where I could touch the wave Salt of water meet salt of tears Nothing for me to hold but save And hold the sanity, loose the fears The lapping, lapping toe tapping Movement calls me in and flapping Arms like gulls above Wander into the salty brine Killing time to meet my love But the riptide pulls at my feet The waves grow colder and Splashing greets My back and side and face, salt stings And like emotions sliding backwards brings Up and upward, the tidal of blue Mixed with green and weeds of life In translucent beauty, rising high Carrying Neptune’s emotions to crest Ready to crash upon my breast Emotional day, dead ahead As the salt claims the sea of bed 01.11.01 |
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© Copyright 2001 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Sunshine~ I love this........ -SEA |
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Martie
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Karilea--Wow...this has such a haunting pull, so very well written and the imagery superb...the sea, the sea can be so frightening, as can emotions sting. |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Kari love, this is truly spectacular, do i love this one? ...... I don't know, what do you think? (Yes well you must get fed up of me saying Good better best.) And it is by the by, absolutely wonderful. Totally enthralled me, pulled me into the water and I was shaking Neptune by the hand! (Or would that be trident Oh so that's why he's!!! My these ledgends can get saucy Love it dear heart Take care love Majestic Marsha Take back the hope you gave,- I claim Only a memory of the same Robert Browning |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
this is excellent Sunshine. . . if only we could get these signs. . . ----------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
SEA...did you feel the pull?...aha...thank you... Martie, if one were to enjoy the imagery, I am glad that it is you....for you would tell me if I were off the mark...thank you... Marsha: next challenge...write a poem of a saucy legend....now!....hugs....{~,^} Sven, an excellent from you is a badge worn with honor, thank you... |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Yes, dear Sunshine, I did -SEA |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Kari love, what right now? You want one right this minute. Yea gods girl, okay my mentor, I'll do what I can. (it might not be brilliant now, but I'll try) Takle care love, (Marsha exits stage right mumbling about work, and no play mmmmmmm ) Majestic Marsha Take back the hope you gave,- I claim Only a memory of the same Robert Browning |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
SEA...thank you... Marsha...I knew you would find time to play... |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
you sure know how to write about it.... *sigh*... great lines, excellent imagery, all in all you SEE so clearly, don't you? ... thank you for this.... |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
No, Doreen...sometimes I need a very large map; othertimes, I am just dog-gone lucky... but I thank you for reading!... |
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Krawdad Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597 |
Sunshine, I like the mystery in the song. The sea is like that. Nice write. /:^)== ==#= |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Loved the pacing in this, and of course the whole thing too. I agree with the haunting quality to it, the longing. good write me friend...enjoyed it much. jwesley |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Seems that the salt of the sea is ripping into your torn heart as well....take care of you Karilea...this is an amazing poem and reminds me that there is no where that I can run that I don't take my emotions and thoughts with me....it would be nice to take a brief vacation once in a while wouldn't it....*sigh*...someday! Thoughts and prayers with you and yours....and once again the words of someone that understands starts my day with a peace that I can only find here in the weaves~ Swim in the waves of the weave...Not the mind of the weaver~ |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Krawdad...[I get the giggles with your name...] glad you liked....thank you! James....thank you for your comment...this piece likes me, too... Holly, I take exceptional care of myself...and when I don't....my friends step in....and I'll keep weaving if you keep writing and reading...deal?....thought so! Hugs.... |
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Beckalini Member
since 2001-01-02
Posts 151Yorkshire, England |
Sunshine, this truly is an enchanting read. The imagery coupled with the rhythm hit me like a lullaby. Excellent write! *hugs*, Becky. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Thank you Becky....I had not thought of it as a lullaby....but hey, it works for me!... |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
This is fabulous, Karilea! Very beautiful! Denise |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Denise, I shall always thank you for many things...for noticing this, especially...thank you... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
well you made me miss the beach and it's cold! |
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