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Open Poetry #11
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Love in the Mail
| Open Poetry #11 |
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Love in the Mail |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA 
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I got love in the mail today - a wonderful surprise! A wealth of great magnificense appeared before my eyes! I'd always felt alone in life...love was not meant to be But love came in the mail and made a wondrous change in me. I found out for a fact I'm held in very high regard By those kind folks who let me use their Chase Gold Visa card. They think of me so highly by the way I always use it They want to raise my limit! Lucky me! I can't refuse it! Then Allstate wants to save me cash...they give me their assurance That I'll be saving hundreds if I take out their insurance. Now is that love or what to know they're looking out for me? Thank God the "good hands" people treat me so considerately.. The Boy Scouts think I'm wonderful. The Moose and Elks do, too. They send me address labels - what a loving thing to do! And Ed McMahon want me to receive a million bucks... Has any man alive been blessed with such fantastic luck? Some company is quite concerned that people of my age Don't find it quite so easy to get up for passion's rage But they'll be glad to send me pills to help old guys like me. It's great to know that someone cares I'm happy sexually! The charities all love me - so do churches - there;s no end To all those loving people that consider me their friend. Just opening those letters can evaporate my sorrow And that was just today--I can't wait until tomorrow!!! [This message has been edited by Balladeer (edited 11-17-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Sometimes it takes a long time to find your real mail in the midst of all that junk..I recieved a check from a customer in the mail along with a whole pile of love as you call it...and I decided to throw it all out..wow! was he ever insulted when I sent him a past due statement.....I love the way you've composed this piece There sure is a lot of kind and wonderful people out there that want to help out...... rock of ages cleft for me for a slightly higher fee. great poem!!!!ethome |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Balladeer, Well you got that right. A very clever work. |
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
Now you have gone and done it. I know for a fact that you SIR are lying. Ed McMahon told me that he wanted to give me the one million dollars. So if you'd lie about that what else would you lie about. Maybe Toerag and LngJhn are telling the truth about you. My what a disappointment this is.  [This message has been edited by inot2B (edited 11-17-2000).] |
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aurora rain Member
since 2000-11-15
Posts 90 |
very witty. and the subject was unusual and piqued my interest well. i can't write such straightforward poetry. |
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OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
I'm a little perturbed, there is no mention of the excellent Readers Digest in your poem, they are constantly offering me substantial ammounts of money, and I feel the destruction of 40,000 acres of Amazon rain forrest is a small price to pay for my continual inclusion in their excellent and informative publicity material. Great poem !!!! Regards Olias. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
As is most usual, Sir Deer...you've provided me with my daily, well, at least-once-weekly giggle... until I read further and started laughing riotously...and righteously, I might add...for what you call "love" mail...I call JUNK... and I get SO much of it...LOL... quit being so clever, or at least, let some of us underlings have a little of that wit, hey? Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
it's absolutely amazing all the things you can get in the mail... one day i'm going to write a book about it  *wink* i Love this..... wonderful writing, as always, Michael |
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Rosebud1229 Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813North Carolina |
well you know what I never knew they were love letters, all this time I keep tearing them up and throwing them away, I guess I'll have to start taking a gander at them, isn't it strange though that the same people you talk of are writing me love letters too, must be some kind of conspiracy here. |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
gave me the giggles..ha..those platinum people have been after me for along time..im not giving in..i like my old fashioned american express green card ha...i just moved into a house and the woman that used to live here ordered every catalog in the world..i dont need magazines im set for life..ha..i get everything from pots and pans catalogs,chef catalogs..clothes cars..linen catalogs..you name i got it.. candy ..cookies ..travel..  loved your poem.~Victoria~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
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peppermint35 Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106Texas, USA |
Oh thank goodness for you; you've changed my life!!! And all the time I thought those people didn't care.... this was a fun read Pepper "A poem is the very image of life expressed in its eternal truth." Percy Bysshe Shelley |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
'Deer, what else would you get but love letters? I vote for the conspiracy theory given that here in Aus I also receive the same kind of love letters from different writers and Reader's Digest oh yes! I may already be a winner. Write on Kethry Why do yesterdays remain and todays pass by ...unnoticed? Rex E. Alford |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Now I'm really upset... I thought for sure that I was the only one they were writing to... and now I find they're two-timing me...  |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Wonderful Michael, thanks for the grins ... I'll be thinking about ya next time I open my mail box! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
Michael- as always a wonderful read from you! i laughed out loud at this one and also grinned. thanks! oh and it must be a real BIG conspiracy cuz I'm getting the SAME i love you letters ...sounds like someoneis ummm cheating LOL. great write! take care. ~amy~ |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
*giggles* a fun poem to read, loved the humor... -Tier |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
If you ever run short of Love in the mail...let me know...I'd be happy to forward mine to you because the mail-person is really starting to wonder about all the love mail I'm getting Excellent write 'deer....I "ZZZZZzzzzzzerbert" you ~You cannot dance in the sun until you have cried in the rain~ |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
LOL I love this one Deer! LOLOLOL So true isn't it? I tell ya I never got so many credit card offers until I bought a house, geez now they give em away. Love it Mike! I needed this laugh |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
If money is the root of all evil why do all the churches want it? hmmm.... yeah about that many people love me too... just wait till I divorce them all.... then we'll see... lol... nice work Baladeer |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Gosh, I thought I was only one loved by those who love you...and now I find there's two...what am I to do? Great smile poem! |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Sending you a love letter, love letter! Corinne |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Thank you, Deer, for explaining The error of my ways... Here, I sit feeling lonely When each and every day I toss all those entreaties From folks hoping to prevail In relieving me of time and money - I thought it was just junk mail! I see that I will have to give My "love letters" more attention. But I'll still tell off telemarketers In terms ladies shouldn't mention! I understand I might be losing Opportunity for romance... But those phone calls are a nuisance! I'll just have to take the chance! Love this one, Deer! *S* |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
yuh got wit down to the ty very nice deer i hate you you know (wait that's just jealousy) |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
And when the mail doesn't run, ya still got all them one nine hundred numbers? |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
In case we didn't get enough giggles in our Christmas mail, this needs a little "bump" back up...'cause that "love" mail is going to start flowing in after the holidays... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
just stopped in to read, thanks for the cheer-up Balladeer. I needed a giggle. |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
well i will rather receive those than the Hot and Horny women ads they have been sending me.... or will i not?LOL i loved your sentiments and i thought they were very nicely penned |
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EagleScorpion Senior Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 1644Here, Now, Forever |
HaHa! Someone sent you viagra? CAMERADO, I GIVE YOU MY HAND! I GIVE YOU MY LOVE MORE PRECIOUS THAN MONEY, I GIVE YOU MYSELF BEFORE PREACHING OR LAW; WILL YOU GIVE ME YOURSELF? WILL YOU COME TRAVEL WITH ME? SHALL WE STICK BY EACH OTHER AS LONG AS WE LIVE? -Walt Whitman |
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shinamoon Junior Member
since 2000-12-07
Posts 15Daytona Beach, usa |
ok i really thought i was the one who got all the love but i guess there is enough to go around so i will not be hurt but if they would like to share the expense of their love with a check or two, say 10 g's even 5 g's i couln't find it in my heart to share that tho!!!! lol nice little ditty i liked it and it even put a smile on my bah hum bug after xmas blue face... |
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shinamoon Junior Member
since 2000-12-07
Posts 15Daytona Beach, usa |
ok i really thought i was the one who got all the love but i guess there is enough to go around so i will not be hurt but if they would like to share the expense of their love with a check or two, say 10 g's even 5 g's i couln't find it in my heart to share that tho!!!! lol nice little ditty i liked it and it even put a smile on my bah hum bug after xmas blue face... |
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