Open Poetry #11 |
Exposed |
spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA |
Exposed What secrets lie in this head of mine Unlocked by happenings of each day Each teaches me that in time I can surely find my way This vision that I draw in word Gives pictures of my dying needs All pieces of the sounds you’ve heard An image of a heart that bleeds Exposure of my inner side A heart in overflow These things that I would often hide Left here for all to know These words are here for my release So long as I can gain my peace. |
||
© Copyright 2000 Richard Rendall - All Rights Reserved | |||
Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Rich...I have read this so many times now and I still feel I am reading more than you are saying...or perhaps less...it intrigues me.... Ignore those who would clip your wings...fly ever upward...even if it means scorched wings |
||
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Wow...okay, grin, I'm awake now...how did I miss this? (I know, I know, MS. Magoo) You did a terrific job, I am so proud of you. And you are going to love the Triolet form I send you later...and more of these please. You are a natural. OH. And the message is well understood. HUGS to you. |
||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Wow! This is really wonderful -SEA |
||
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
You should be able to gain your peace after writing a great poem like this...I think it is very well crafted with meaning!! I enjoyed it very much.......ethome |
||
spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA |
Thank You Paula, Serenity, Sea and ethome. My first attempt at this format and am glad the message wasn't lost in the write. Rich |
||
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
This vision that I draw in word Gives pictures of my dying needs All pieces of the sounds you’ve heard An image of a heart that bleeds Exposure of my inner side A heart in overflow These things that I would often hide Left here for all to know These words are here for my release So long as I can gain my peace. =================== I really like this style of expression from you...it suits your emotive writing... this is a very cool poem... and you describe and define the reasons we write. jm Sprayed across my heart and hers Danced butterflies in the wild This angel, this woman , who loves me with the innocence of a child. ~DeVante~ |
||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
This is very good. I enjoyed this! Denise |
||
spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA |
Thank you very much Janet and Denise. I am very pleased with the response that I have recieved with this one. Rich [This message has been edited by spiked (edited 11-30-2000).] |
||
CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
"THESE WORDS ARE HERE FOR MY RELEASE SO LONG AS I CAN GAIN MY PEACE" SPIKED, absolutely a terrific write... Coco |
||
spiked Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 873Hammond, La USA |
Thank you dear Coco Rich |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |