Open Poetry #11 |
My eyelids close to the touch of tender |
wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
I’d hold you in my arms, love But then one day you’d fall For everything must do so It’s planned in nature’s call It’s the gravity of nature My heart weighs down in tow Watching a love that soars so high While tossed amongst the flow To know intent of nature’s reap The hope that love rejoices Weighs in reason my own demise Relief in bitter choices The touch of even my own skin Unnatural to the finger Cold and longing for thirsty love My dying begins to linger This be the last of my loving render My eyelids close to the touch of tender [This message has been edited by wayoutwalt (edited 11-22-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 Walt Burns - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Walt, please, no "yuhs" here...this is exquisite in its tenderness, and I'm putting it in my library... this is beauty, indeed.... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
Walt, I enjoyed this tender read and like our friend Sunshine this one goes straight into the library... "The touch of even my own skin Unnatural to the finger Cold and longing for thirsty love My dying begins to linger" Yuh got style Walt |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
Sunshine thank you so much for reading. you are my cheerleader Cocobaci cocobaci I lovey your comments as much as i love your name cocobaci cocobaci. |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
humm.. this reminds me so much of one of Dylan Thomas’s pieces, not in style or form or anything but in tone and message - trying here to remember which it was ..hang in there I’ll go try and find it......yep there ya go: The force that through the green fuse drives the flower The force that through the green fuse drives the flower Drives my green age; that blasts the roots of trees Is my destroyer. And I am dumb to tell the crooked rose My youth is bent by the same wintry fever. The force that drives the water through the rocks Drives my red blood; that dries the mouthing streams Turns mine to wax. And I am dumb to mouth unto my veins How at the mountain spring the same mouth sucks. The hand that whirls the water in the pool Stirs the quicksand; that ropes the blowing wind Hauls my shroud sail. And I am dumb to tell the hanging man How of my clay is made the hangman's lime. The lips of time leech to the fountain head; Love drips and gathers, but the fallen blood Shall calm her sores. And I am dumb to tell a weather's wind How time has ticked a heaven round the stars. And I am dumb to tell the lover's tomb How at my sheet goes the same crooked worm. Dylan Thomas anyway Walt, nice poem ...... more please ....and i agree with Sunshine, no yuh’s please we’re british ........or something .......see ya philip |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
ahh thanks poertree my hat tips off to you |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
W.O.W. you are earning your name my friend! The title alone was enough to sweep a girl off her feet but then to add the weave...absolutely exquisite writing!! You cannot dance in the sun until you have cried in the rain~ |
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Saunni Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777West Virginia |
This is a truly amazing poem! This is beyond great! Thanks. Sauni Sauni :) Have you ever known the color grey when the nighttime finds you weak I have, I've walked that road each time; that's where my angel sleeps |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
SATPSYCH! Exquisite penning Walt... K The wind shifts like this: Like a human without illusions... This is how the wind shifts: Like a human, heavy and heavy, Who does not care. W.S |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
thnaky ladies much appreciated! |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
shhhh, WOW....I just keep coming back to this, I think I've read it half a dozen times...but don't tell anyone of this little obsession...half of it is the wonderful title... titles are the key to opening the door... yes... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
This is exceptional writing, Walt. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
Sunshine you ar so gracious thank you Claire you are too kind thank you |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
This poem more than lives up to its beautiful title. *S* Well done! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Truly an exquisite work here, walt. You never fail to amaze me with the quality and growth of your poetry. Much applause from me. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Wow Walt...I saw the title of your poem and knew I was in for a treat...and it was...wonderful writing!! |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
This is nothing less than a song! It's lyrical in quality and the title is a song in itself! Thank you for posting this! What is that you express in your eyes? It seems to me more than all the words I have read in my life. Walt Whitman |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
got me beaming here...thank you all |
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