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Open Poetry #11
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Too Weak Ghazal
| Open Poetry #11 |
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Too Weak Ghazal |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Too sad to know the wrong from right, Two hands too weak for holding tight, Still clutch the book left to her that night, Two hands too weak for holding tight, She walks too slow and looks for light, Two hands too weak for holding tight, With eyes too pale for reading words right, Two hands too weak for holding tight, To drop to ground the book lost from sight Two hands too weak for holding tight, She walks and know she’ll not find light Two hands too weak for holding tight, Too cold too old she can no longer fight Two hands too weak for holding tight. Gloom 01 |
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| © Copyright 2001 Aszard Drazlom - All Rights Reserved | |||
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
two hands, too weak... for she to hold and yet she clasps and reaches, bold to see what's there despite her "old" two hands too weak or so she's told.... *s ~Wynter getting there... "The worst prison would be a closed heart". ...Pope John Paul II |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you for the fine poetic response. I am glad you enjoyed mine so much as to respond such. Gloom |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
i found this to be very sad as it made me think of my mother and her arthritis..and the fact im not getting any younger either ha...nicely written ~V~ |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Prof you touched on many things related to this stage in a person's life and though they be sad they are a part of reality and I thought you penned it well...love for them never dies and love from them never dies! |
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kindasorta Member
since 2000-12-02
Posts 56 |
all you say may be so true the age, the hands and weak eyes too yet the weak one of which you speak only wanting to be left alone having to fight against the strong tell me sir, who's right or wrong? she is not intimidated nor does her agenda change the weak one expected attacks she knows NOW who's the enemy you may call her weak, you may call her old, you may call her what ever you choose but call her defending her rights. |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, Victoria, Glad you liked it, Sometimes the strength of body, Or lack of it, as it this case, Is overcome by the will of the mind. Thank you, ethome, I am pleased you like these words, Each stage of life has both joys and sadness, It shouldn’t stop the care and concern we have for them. Thank you, kindasorta, I didn’t think I assigned right or wrong, Or made a judgement with the poem. But such is the nature of poetry That we might each read the words And make our own evaluations. Gloom |
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KokoStewartKoomoa Senior Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 580Waikiki, Hawaii |
This is an interesting form that I have not tried yet. Is it Hebrew? Do you have information for me to know how it is done? It carried a great message..if sad..it is part of life... it was well expressed. This form does remind me of pantoum a little. Email me if you can tell me a little about this, please  Passion,imagination and intellect running together... Poetry in motion~~~ Aloha with warmest regards, Koko |
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