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Snow

Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

0 posted 2000-12-31 12:02 PM

You Asked...

remembering causes pain
to take the pain away would
mean climbing with the vines
and I wont go on that trip

and yet...
to keep feeling it all,
kills me
a little more with each
memory...

if I turned off the music
it wouldn't matter, his
face would be there
and I would still be lost
in his eyes and
the taste of his lips would
still be as sweet as they
were when he first kissed me
hello

while the bitterness
of when he said
good-bye, is waiting to
take over

I'm falling apart.. no rhyme
or reason why I can't let
go ... he did.. and yet,
here I am
unglued

shattered pieces of my heart
blow across the sky
and I can feel how I'm fading
into the shadows
no longer a part of him
no longer ... me

I thought that I had found the
other half of my soul
we both agreed, I was he...
he was ... me
but then
he gave me, back ... me
and I was less than I was
before ... him

and you ask ...
if I'm all right?
No
but the music still
plays and the next
song isn't ours, and
the vines ... no longer
have roots.

font: cac camelot
12/30/00

"...I am a river in winter,
quiet in the eyes of most
but deep,
swift and full of life
to one, lucky enough to fall through the ice.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2000-12-31 08:10 AM

This empty spot
here in my heart
as given to one
then left, undone
shall it ever be
whole again?
When soul again
should my vision see
will that whole
then, just then,
be me?

Snow, lovely, haunting write...well done my friend...well done...

ethome
Member Patricius

since 2000-05-14

Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

2 posted 2000-12-31 08:49 AM

Very sad but hauntingly beautiful! Well written piece it's just that....well... I think the vines still have roots....just me?

Snow

Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

3 posted 2000-12-31 05:09 PM

thank you for the replies on a piece that traveled from the soul out...

the vines are a personal metaphor that i use, but hopefully use it in a way that leaves it open for the reader to take it however they need to.

snow

"...I am a river in winter,
quiet in the eyes of most
but deep,
swift and full of life
to one, lucky enough to fall through the ice.

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

4 posted 2000-12-31 10:07 PM

I know it hurts...but don't let it hurt too long...it's easy for someone to let go that didn't care very much and hard for those that care too much...be strong and be brave...James

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-21

Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song

5 posted 2000-12-31 10:37 PM

and you ask ...
if I'm all right?
No
but the music still
plays and the next
song isn't ours, and
the vines ... no longer
have roots.

===============================

I loved the ending to this one the most, but the whole poem sang of pain. Very well written and filled with much emotion.

John R
Member

since 2000-12-14

Posts 141
Toledo OH

6 posted 2000-12-31 10:51 PM

I feel your pain in this poem Snow. I understand what it is like to speak from the soul.

If a dream touches us, it exists to us as anything else that touches us.
John

Snow

Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

7 posted 2000-12-31 11:45 PM

James, Mark and John...

your comments are so heartfelt.. thank you very much!

mark, you quoted my own favorite part. ;-)

happy new year !

Snow

"...I am a river in winter,
quiet in the eyes of most
but deep,
swift and full of life
to one, lucky enough to fall through the ice.

Irish Rose
Member Patricius

since 2000-04-06

Posts 10263

8 posted 2001-01-01 01:10 AM

I know the pain in these words. I too had a vine at one time, or thought I did. But they live without roots. They live without roots because they also live in water. I wasn't bathed in love and it died, now I live....
swimming in the life that will never end.

"Every man dies.
Not every man truly lives."
Braveheart

Kathleen

dgvarner
Member Elite

since 2000-05-13

Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida

9 posted 2001-01-01 02:13 AM

very real, very big ache..i can feel it strangle me..i can only imagine how the ache affects YOU..

i've seen this before..in me..and i know, it truly hurts....

i like the way you've written this, straight from the souls core...

wishing for you a new start in the new year..find you..

hugs, g

"people who need people are the luckiest people..." barbra s.

Snow

Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

10 posted 2001-01-02 01:33 AM

I really appreciate all the comments on this piece. thank you very much.

snow

"...I am a river in winter,
quiet in the eyes of most
but deep,
swift and full of life
to one, lucky enough to fall through the ice.

Kethry
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-29

Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

11 posted 2001-01-03 05:25 AM

Snow,
no comments my friend the poem speaks strongly enough to drown out anything I might say. But
*heartfelt HuGS*
Keth

Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen.

Mother_Earth
Senior Member

since 2000-11-20

Posts 1370
1/2 year Texas & 1/2 year Michigan

12 posted 2001-01-04 09:13 AM

Snow, I wish I could help take the pain away, but some say you grow with pain and will be stronger. Not sure if I believe those "some". I can help with .....love and hugs, Mother E

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