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Open Poetry #11
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verse's end
| Open Poetry #11 |
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verse's end |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738
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I feel it leaving, exit me, every other, other day… I feel it enter, enter me, a bone, to hold the dogs at bay. I feel presence deep within, a war, in keep of mortal sin… I feel a presence within Sin— and pray I be, Without-- again… Absconding flesh but to ascend. Pretend that I am pure again. No blood upon my hands of fear— nothing, nothing, Nothing’s clear… Time is but the tick of watch-- rhyme being but a trick— the cloth, of a blind so gently tied… a capture of the tears I cry… Unleash my hands and let me be! If I must die, may I die free? Upon my feet… I’ll take the fall. Upon my knees I’ll beg for all - that by my might Live it again, upon my knees— to stand again. Upon my knees, I pray—ascend… Re-write the curse Of verse’s end… |
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| © Copyright 2000 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
How do you do this...touch souls like this?...well done Serenity... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Bullseye, Karen. You hit the Balladeer button dead center. This has become my personal favorite fo yours....this poem is so good I don't really have the words for it... |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I feel it leaving, exit me, every other, other day… I feel it enter, enter me, a bone, to hold the dogs at bay. I feel presence deep within, a war, in keep of mortal sin… I feel a presence within Sin— and pray I be, Without-- again… ================ Unleash my hands and let me be! If I must die, may I die free? Upon my feet… I’ll take the fall. Upon my knees I’ll beg for all - that by my might Live it again, upon my knees— to stand again. Upon my knees, I pray—ascend… Re-write the curse Of verse’s end… =============== oh baby... wow...this is amazing sen may i echo Deer's reply ... this brings me to me worshipin knees  awesome writing me twin ... feel ya here beneath me skin ... me loves ya girlie-girl me Some people find subtlety in strangers if you find anything~let me in Your eyes~you see everything my eyes~I see it all together now~and I know |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
Serenity, I have grown fond of your poetry and this one, I confess, has got to be one of my favorites... I thank you for sharing... So into my library it goes for many more readings...  coco |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
Gosh darn, I missed the thread button I apologize for this error |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
Absolutely love the flow of this one. It's an amazing piece. |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Wow, serenity. I love this poem. The ENTIRE piece is awesome in it's sheer power. Excellent write, dear - definately one of your best, imho. Michael |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Se'en, No words, just astonishment and this:  You tame words like a maiden tames the unicorn. Keth Religion is for people frightened about going to hell - Spirituality is for people who have been there. Anon. |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
Excellent poetry. A true pleasure to read and experience. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
yanno? I feel like I just gave a party and almost all of my favorite poets showed up...thank you much...you've made my day!!! |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Okay, so I am late to the party but it is only because I have been trying to learn new words for this lovely piece. Will you forgive me. I don't have the proper words to tell you just how "FANTASMAGICAL" this one was so I will just have to go along with the others and say, YOU HAVE NOW MOVED BEYOND THE REACHES AND CONFINES OF THE EARTH and now your poetry is soaring in the heavens with the rest of the stars. A life with love will have some thorns, but a life without love will have no roses. author unknown |
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Poeminister Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862Regina SK; Canada |
Serenity-A wonderous piece. Excellent writing. Poeminister "...no single sound too rude upon thy slumber shall intrude, Our thoughts, our souls- O God above! In every deed shall mingle, love." -Poe |
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