Open Poetry #11 |
If I Could |
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
If I could I would have you come to me Into my mind and stay with me. You'd be my queen, I'd be your king. And all the world would be your ring. I'd build for you, create for you, Change the very world for you. Whisper me your smallest cherish And I would grant in love the wish. I'd make come true my dreams for you And the stars would light it's view, Of worlds beyond laid in care, Just for you to look and stare. I'd mist your mind with fairy tales And hold your hand along its trails Make ecstasy our goal And dance with you, soul to soul. I'd place the apple back the tree For your love and to pleasure thee Banish the snake from the garden Ask the lord his grace and pardon. I could these things within my mind But you must grant my so inclined. |
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© Copyright 2000 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
*sigh**sigh* yes, I do love the romance of your writing. Wonderful. The lady is blessed who has this offer. Much love from me to you. http://www.geocities.com/karenltorbiak/StartimesPoetry.html |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Seymour~ This is perfect! It's going into my library for safe keeping.........what a gem!! Love this! -SEA |
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Lady Lightning Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 422Kentucky |
WOW...This is so, so good...So romantic..I liked it much and just like SEA said,it's surely a keeper... ~LL~< !signature--> The way to love anything is to realize it might be lost. author unknown [This message has been edited by Lady Lightning (edited 12-18-2000).] |
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RobertB Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104Champaign, IL |
very nice Seymour I see another side to you< !signature--> if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming. [This message has been edited by RobertB (edited 12-18-2000).] |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Yes, you would do all of that and more for your Lady Love... and she would cherish the ring of the world in your sigh... she'd better incline to this...or we'll all be shaking our collective heads... and how to place firmly, but gently, into my library...< !signature--> Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ [This message has been edited by Sunshine (edited 12-18-2000).] |
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Poeminister Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862Regina SK; Canada |
Beautiful writing. Poeminister |
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kindasorta Member
since 2000-12-02
Posts 56 |
Lovely Semore, lovely but me thinks the lady wants to take care of her own apple (s); This is such a lovely fantacy you've weaved and speaks admirable of your character-but, we have to contend with Adam and his actions, huh?! good write. |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Keep writing like this ST and you'll be beating them away from your door for sure. jwesley |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I would have you come to me Into my mind and stay with me. You'd be my queen, I'd be your king. And all the world would be your ring. ======================== I'd make come true my dreams for you And the stars would light it's view, Of worlds beyond laid in care, Just for you to look and stare. I'd mist your mind with fairy tales And hold your hand along its trails Make ecstasy our goal And dance with you, soul to soul. I'd place the apple back the tree For your love and to pleasure thee Banish the snake from the garden Ask the lord his grace and pardon. I could these things within my mind But you must grant my so inclined. ============== OH WOW!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY!!!!!!!!!!!! BIG OLE *SIGH* look at you writing your heart across the sky This is way beyond cool ... I adore this poem... what amazing imagery and metaphors of promise... "all the world would be your ring." "And the stars would light it's view, Of worlds beyond laid in care, Just for you to look and stare." "I'd mist your mind with fairy tales" "And dance with you, soul to soul." again I say OH MY!! me thinks me can fly after reading this rhyme divine rang me chimes sweet Sy *winkiewinkie* later-so-inclined-gator me Some people find subtlety in strangers if you find anything~let me in Your eyes~you see everything my eyes~I see it all together now~and I know |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Startime, Thank you for the sigh and wonderful. Sea, Thank you for the gem. Lady, Thank you for the WOW. Robert, Nice comment. Sunshine, You are sweet. *L* Poeminister, Thank you for the beautiful. Kindasorta, Thanks for the lovely. Jwesley, My door is open, thanks. JM, And all the world will be your ring. Winkiewinkie Stinky |
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Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
What a masterpiece...Seymour....you get nothing from me impressions of excellence.....peace! Nathan |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Nate, Thanks for dropping in and thanks for the nice comment. |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi Sy, WOW, you amaze me always with such beauty, wonderfully done, very much enjoyed. Love, Cerenity "God doesn't have to be reminded that we exist. We have to be reminded that He exist!" (Writer Unknown) |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Cerenity, So glad you enjoyed. |
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