Open Poetry #11 |
Plastic you |
Ramses Junior Member
since 2000-12-14
Posts 40Porsgrunn, Telemark, Norway |
PLASTIC YOU.... Will you let me see your naked skin in the mirror I think you are as plastic as it gets. Hope to God I see you know while you still are fresh Hope to God you have no regrets Let me see your face without makeup Amazing what some powder can do I know you cover the dark spots when you get the chance Exposing the unnatural you Let me hear your voice when you`re sleeping I know it doesn`t sound the same Shaping it, so you sound more like a woman Well, who are you to blame Isn`t it nice to just buy a life of your own An image built up right from the start A hologram of you that everyone likes Playing the perfect part But everything has its sideeffects All the hard demands to match Who really cares what you expect Living whitout a scratch Will you ever come to see that you are dead All that is left is a shell Covered in all the beautiful things we like To see, to hear and to smell Perfection has its brutal price to be payed Blood sweat and tears Well you payed it then and you pay it now Giving your best years And shining brightly in faked sunlight Glimmering with your mask I see you from a distance really So who am I to ask Finally my dear, have you thought of this You`re loosing in the end When they prey for someone to forget Who do you think they`ll send? Someone real who cares and thinks Knowing what is wrong Or someone fake with hollow eyes Singing an indifferent song At last you realize the all so painfull thruth You missed it from the start In the process of making plastic you You also sold your heart…. -Ramses- |
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© Copyright 2000 Robert Hafredal - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Ramses~ WELCOME! Wow.......powerful piece.....grand entrance........look forward to more -SEA |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
this reads like a song... it's lyrical, full of truths, anger, love... it's a really good piece.. there's lots in here. the last stanza is priceless... sums it up beautifully... barbie would have loved it! lol and, btw... welcome! i'll look for more or your work... i enjoyed this very much! - all you can ever really ask out of life is a sincere apology and some decent poetry - |
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BirdeeB Member
since 2000-09-16
Posts 106USA |
Welcome!! Wonderfully written =o) BirdeeB |
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Ramses Junior Member
since 2000-12-14
Posts 40Porsgrunn, Telemark, Norway |
SEA - Thank you, nice to finally put out some of my work, and especially in this community with all the lovely people... Doreen Peri - This was written to a good friend of mine, and I will give it to her someday, maybe she realizes. It was actually a song in the beginning, but evolved more into a poem at the end...Thank you for reading BirdeeB - Nice to hear that you like it, that means alot to me...Thenk you |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
Welcome, to the board with a human heart. You have come to us with a beautiful example of your writing. This one has a powerful message. Much love to you from me. |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Very impressive entry to Passions. Welcome. This poem is quite amazing. Peace. Sandra |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
WOW is right. What a remarkable post to enter our home with. Welcome to Passions and please enjoy and roam the walls here and then delight us with some more of your wonderful works. So very true in what you write. I wonder if the knowledge is there when one sells their heart or if they are truely blind. A life with love will have some thorns, but a life without love will have no roses. author unknown |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I could've sworn I replied to this...I've read it a number of times...I too, have a problem with the "plastic people" in my life...well, actually, not any more...when they come around now, I just turn up the heat! *winks* and welcome! I look forward to reading many more! |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
Welcome to passions, and you have penned a powerful piece here....great entrance. Charisma |
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Ramses Junior Member
since 2000-12-14
Posts 40Porsgrunn, Telemark, Norway |
Startime Thank you for your kind words...Love to you too...And it feels good to be part of this Catalinamoon I wanted to tell you this because I think it`s so sad seeing this in people I love. Thanx for reading... Mark Bohannan The sadest thing is that people do this even though they`re aware of the consequences... Thanx for commenting... Serenity I`ll try turning up the heat and see what happens, he he he... Peace to you.. Charisma Thanks for your comment...The best thing with this forum is that so many nice people encourages to futher postings.... -Everyone out there, you`re the best... I salute you all... Ramses |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Ramses, wow!!, I love this, smoot hand straight to the point. I know a few persons I could give this too I enjoyed it very much, adding it to my library. Welcome to Passions please check your email for a special greeting. Maree "If my words could blanket the skies and fill every corner and crevice of this earth, still this wouldn't be enough" "Maree Russo" |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Welcome to passions..hope you enjoy..and looking forward to reading more from you ~Victoria~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
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kindasorta Member
since 2000-12-02
Posts 56 |
Hello, Enjoyed the poem as I know this person and would like to share their point of view, (for fairness sake, agreed?)! They loss nothing!! gained knowledge to fill a book and self esteem, whew! it flies! her heart has never pumped stronger and must confess, have not seen her looking so good in years. Just a note from the other side of the coin, if you will, deary! so enjoyed your little rhyme. |
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kindasorta Member
since 2000-12-02
Posts 56 |
Hello, Enjoyed the poem as I know this person and would like to share their point of view, (for fairness sake, agreed?)! They loss nothing!! gained knowledge to fill a book and self esteem, whew! it flies! her heart has never pumped stronger and must confess, have not seen her looking so good in years. Just a note from the other side of the coin, if you will, deary! so enjoyed your little rhyme. |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Ramses, This is a really powerful entrance, I can't imagine why I didn't see this before. And I'm sorry, for being late with my reply. Really excellant writing I'm sure you'll love it here. Oh and WELCOME, I used to have a brain honestly, it's just I'm a little tired. Take care Marsha Take back the hope you gave,- I claim Only a memory of the same Robert Browning |
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Ramses Junior Member
since 2000-12-14
Posts 40Porsgrunn, Telemark, Norway |
DarkAngel Thank you for your kind words It feels good to be part of this forum, learn alot of you more experienced writers...Thanks for the e-mail to, NICE ) Victoria Love to be here, keep posting your work Kindasorta he he he...Your comments are always welcome loved your little poem there at the end. Marsha Better late then never If your brain is as big as your heart you have nothing to worry about P.S I`m tired to, didn`t sleep this night.Working on a paper...Yuk |
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John R Member
since 2000-12-14
Posts 141Toledo OH |
What price beauty HUH? But to quote an old cliche. "it is only skin deep." Well written and to the point. If a dream touches us, it exists to us as anything else that touches us. John |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
makes me realize I'm 50 yrs. old! good writing, indepth< !signature--> "If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you." Winnie the Pooh [This message has been edited by Irish Rose (edited 12-19-2000).] |
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Cassandra Junior Member
since 2000-12-16
Posts 48Charlotte, North Carolina, USA |
Wow. I was drawn into this from the very beginning. So much power and truth spoke here. Fantastic writing here. One of my favorites so far. Thank you much. --Cassandra |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
hi there, this reminded me of an incident a few years back..a mother who allowed her daughter with down's syndrome to undergo cosmetic surgery came under fire for altering nature..she argued that society is prejudiced and if she can lessen the discrimination that her daughter will be suffering from by cosmetic surgery, then why not? i guess what i want to say is that perhaps there arent any easy answers...after all we are judged by society and it may be hard to remain self-assured when all around you think you are ugly...? good poem...thought-provoking...i look forward to more of your work [This message has been edited by kaile (edited 12-19-2000).] |
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EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
Now this is an entrance! Welcome! "The heart and soul have no illusion of boundries when friendship is the quest" ~ My Angel. |
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Ramses Junior Member
since 2000-12-14
Posts 40Porsgrunn, Telemark, Norway |
John R Thax for reading. Skindeep maybe but hard as stone when you don`t have the ability to take it away...The mask that is Irish Rose Years is only a nomber, you`re still young in spirit and mind. Thanx for your kind words... Cassandra... Wow, that was a nice reply...Glad you like it Kaile I actually remember that when you say it, very intelligent remark, dindn`t think of that...Thank you for your nice comment... EagleOne Thanks for your welcome, love being here... Take care. |
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