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eighteen
| Open Poetry #10 |
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eighteen |
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aurora rain Member
since 2000-11-15
Posts 90 |
commentary...? Eighteen was the year you gave up, your strides heavy as you fumbled through the darkness. Five minutes past the clock and you swim swim swim for oblivion, live for the lost (but I still loved you) Satin held you down-tied with ribbons around your neck. Furious lies and nothing knew better than she did five years ago, ten years old then, singing electric in the chorus Christmas songs I knew by heart. One girl fainted at the sight of him, or swore she would last December— the boy she saw on the milk-carton with his face lit up like a New Year’s torch, now in the flesh, his heartbeat the cause of her heedlessness warm-bodied anxiety and audacity. Because he was there. (and because I could not promise anything more) And the crowds sing at the stroke of the hour of a whole new year. There is nothing that can’t be said and your eyes are lemonade-still and impenetrably there— Cold, and at eighteen you sold your heart on that streetcorner for a world more eventful. At eighteen you told me you loved me then you cast this dream away. (be thankful for the six empty glances I cast in your direction, now that you are no longer eighteen) |
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| © Copyright 2000 aurora rain - All Rights Reserved | |||
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Welcome to Passions!! This is a powerful write! How do those things happen anyway? You made an impression on my mind with the futiltiy of the outcome very good!! |
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aurora rain Member
since 2000-11-15
Posts 90 |
bumping this...wow, you all post quickly. |
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Daniel J D Senior Member
since 2000-10-01
Posts 1471Hillcrest, Queensland, Australia |
Aurora, Powerful poem here, really made me realise the fragility of our existence. Welcome to Passions. Respond to my call and let the waves of my heart fill your life with the wonders of love (Daniel J D) |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
Aurora-- this made me THINK ALOT. But that is a good thing hehe. Excellent write! Very powerful and intense. I liked very much. Things in life happen for a reason, as a wise poet once told me...some things are just meant to be.  Take care andI am looking forward to reading more of your work. BTW welcome to Passions. ~Amy~ |
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