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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

0 posted 2000-11-03 08:45 PM



I tried to look so glamorous
To make my man feel amorous.
We hadn't made love for a month or two.
So  I splashed on Christian D'Or
Obsession, Passion, Brut and more
But nothing I attempted seemed to do!

Then I put on a brand new nightie
Made me look like Aphrodite
I mean to tell you I looked like a queen!
I painted myself head to toe
With blush to give myself a glow
But he walked by just like he hadn't seen!

I studied Hints from Heloise
And dabbled catnip on my knees
I painted twenty nails  bright crimson red.
I got a hairdo just like Cher
And got some teflon underwear
But he walked by and just fell into bed!!

But now my lonely days are gone
My man can't wait to "get it on"
My milktoast man has turned into a stud!!
I bought a new nightshirt, you see
That really turned the trick for me
On its front is a great big can of Bud!!!!!


© Copyright 2000 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved
inot2B
Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205
Arkansas
1 posted 2000-11-03 08:51 PM


Yep, that is what it takes to get a mans attention!! LOL
Jamie
Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168
Blue Heaven
2 posted 2000-11-03 08:59 PM


This is the famous Budweiser beer
we know of no brand produced by any other brewer
which cost so much to brew and age
our exclusive beechwood aging produces a taste, a smoothness, and a drinkability you will find in no other beer at any cost.
(If only I could remember important stuff)

Great Poem Ballabeer---err deer


Jamie

Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil.
"Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely".


Ron K. Fox
Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925

3 posted 2000-11-03 09:13 PM


This is hilarious lmao...she must have a nice can! (of beer I mean)

Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox


Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2000-11-03 09:17 PM


LOL...LOL...and my sorry attempt is in Prose!  Oh, Woe is me!

'Deer, you are delicious!


Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, then speak loudly and be bound.
KRJ



Victoria
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869

5 posted 2000-11-03 09:43 PM


You do understand us dont you.. haa...
good one balladeer

                ~Victoria~


A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
- Paul Valery (1871-1945)


lucky
Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 1601
Idaho
6 posted 2000-11-03 09:53 PM


I been wondering up very late just what I should wear to my daughters wedding... tomorrow... (should I give her away in..?) thanks for the ideas Michael.


Rosemary J. Gwaltney
Senior Member
since 1999-08-26
Posts 997
northern mountains, Idaho
7 posted 2000-11-03 10:00 PM


Baby, if you show up at her wedding tomorrow, to give her away, in a nightie, perfume, red nail polish, OR a nightshirt with a picture of BUD on the front, I will CROAK!!!!!!  (Ho - ho!)

With crinkly twinkling smiley love about our daughter Skyla's wedding; your wife Rosemary

~ ~ ~

P.S. Excuse me Balladeer, I surely didn't mean to forget you!  I simply got carried away!  Your poem was ever so clever!  Gave me a great guffaw!!!!!



[This message has been edited by Rosemary J. Gwaltney (edited 11-03-2000).]

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
8 posted 2000-11-03 10:43 PM


The smile started out slowly and spread to a wide grin, then erupted into a giggle which turned into a guffaw until tears ran down my cheeks. Another classic piece of perfection by THE Balladeer!!!    
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

9 posted 2000-11-03 10:47 PM


ROTFLMAO.....
if you start shaving your legs....
Im gonna tell ...
love ya when your writing with whimsey
love ya whether ya write or not  
jm

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
10 posted 2000-11-03 10:48 PM


Balladeer
Boy you really stretched it in this one.
But it snapped back just right. And I toast a Bud to you.

Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
11 posted 2000-11-03 10:52 PM


Bal--

this was hillarious. i laughed
until i practically cried. you always
manage to make me smile no matter what
style of writing you are doing at the
moment. take care. great poem!!

amy  

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
12 posted 2000-11-04 12:06 PM


inot2B....bo! That sounds like experience talking!  

jamie...that sounded important enough to me! Thank you...

Ron..she did! and a good pop-top, too  

sunshine...no attempt of yours is EVER sorry! and thank you for the delicious!! I don't get call that often  

Victoria...I really wish I did!!!!!

lucky...you're gonna get me in big trouble with Rosemary!

Rosemary...I knew it!! LOL! The best of luck and all the happiness in the world to your daughter!

deVine One...Well, you started it! LOL! Thank you for the guffaws...

JanetMarie...START shaving my legs?? hehe..love ya, too, spam sister...

Sy....toast is accepted and shared..

AMy....I LOVE to make you smile!!! Thank you, Amy  

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
13 posted 2000-11-04 07:29 AM


'Deer, when you're good you're good when you're bad you're excellent. This was beery good errr bad errr ...I'm just going to open another beer and go to bed.
Kethry


Growth demands a temporary surrender of security.
Gail Sheehy

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
14 posted 2000-11-04 08:30 AM


'deer, I seem to remember seeing a picture of you in a blue dress! Do YOU remember it?  
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
15 posted 2000-11-04 08:46 AM


This is so - YOU
Funny, clever and a knock'em dead punch at the end
(not the nail polish part)
Liz

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
16 posted 2000-11-04 09:29 AM


Ahhhh, I knew from the title, I was in for a smile.  ROFL ... thank you for never disappointing me Michael!  I'll try your advice, but it may get a little warm, for one Bud may not do it ... I might have to wear a six-pack of nighties!

Best wishes,
/Kit

Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
17 posted 2000-11-04 09:38 AM


I never know what to expect - serious -or comical - so now I just read all you post - this was absolutely hilarious -[even tho' when I drink beer - I always avoid Anhuser(sp?)-Busch and go for a good Micro brew]
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
18 posted 2000-11-04 01:45 PM


Balladeer--ROFLOL...from a florist (that's me) to a pest conrol scientist (that's you)...I can only say...This buds for you!
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