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The River
| Open Poetry #10 |
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The River |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven 
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The piercing echoes of chainsaw screams act as an accelerant upon already searing pain inflamed energy redoubles efforts already frenetic changing grunts into growls resentment becoming anger which ignites the fire of fury furthering the attack against the frozen barrier underfoot icy splinters cut stinging flesh while covering twisted demeaner still - eyes clear of madness yet infected with it's desire look with cloudy desolation through the frozen winter foe to the river that flows below < !signature--> Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". [This message has been edited by Prometheus (edited 11-03-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jamie Patterson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Jamie WOW, Tres magnifique. Kethry Growth demands a temporary surrender of security. Gail Sheehy |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
This is full of power, Jamie......it's truly awesome in describing such a force. You always capture Mother Nature's work in detail, which shows me that you are one with the out-of-doors.  Follow your dream! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
And the river flows on...what vivid contrasts...strong writing! |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Jamie, terrific images penned my friend  Excellent writing! Maree "If my words could blanket the skies and fill every corner and crevice of this earth, still this won't be enough" "Maree Russo" |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
My goodness! Makes me want to hide indoors away from that cold frozen place! Excellent poem sir!  |
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Rosemary J. Gwaltney Senior Member
since 1999-08-26
Posts 997northern mountains, Idaho |
Very powerful and intriguing! I enjoyed it very much! |
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peppermint35 Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106Texas, USA |
Awesome!!! Pepper "I honor the place in you, that when you are in that place, and I am in that place in me, we are in the same place" Ram Dass |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Kethry; SunnyOne; Margie; Maree; Sharon; Rosemary; and Peppermint--- Thanks to each of you for the nice responses to this. It is a metaphor of someones struggle to regain the cliched Rivers of dreams, life et al. from the also cliche' frozen wasteland of loneliness and the near madness it can bring about. Again, thanks for reading. Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Yes, and when one can cut through the ice, the river is still flowing and will always be....this is very powerful, jamie. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Prometheus~ This was a very powerful write ... seems to go to the depths of a soul that is searching for what he knows is there ... but he can't seem to get there from where he is. When the heart feels isolation - it can be a desperate place to dwell. Very poignant feelings here. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Balladeer/Marge-- Thanks you two. It is good to hear such words talents such as yourselves. Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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Ron K. Fox Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925 |
It seems as though some one fell through the ice and is clawing his way back to safety/shore...powerful image. Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
jamie...WOW! very powerful... hugs, dg "i could hide out under there...i just made you say 'underwear'...i could leave but i'll just stay--all my stuff's here anyway..." |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Ron--dg..... Thanks for thinking so, and for taking the time to say it. Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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insect Senior Member
since 2000-04-22
Posts 1014 |
 READ! |
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Toddles Member
since 2000-07-24
Posts 396New Orleans, Louisiana |
Very Nice!!! Todd-Michael Phillips...A Passion's Resident Poet since 5/19/1999 |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Jamie - you're getting good at this!  C |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Insect, Todd and Christopher-- Your kindness encourages me in ways you may not know. Thanks to each of you. |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
jamie energetic piece indeed! i think i might have had difficulty in picking up the metaphor you had in mind without your explanation - but nevertheless there was meaning there for me in any case. thanks philip |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
J ah the contrasts frozen against fire hey? And then that's reinforced by the standard writing against the italics... (are you posting in CA...???) I like it my friend... KThe wind shifts like this: Like a human without illusions... This is how the wind shifts: Like a human, heavy and heavy, Who does not care. W.S |
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