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Open Poetry #10
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If Only
| Open Poetry #10 |
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If Only |
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jonmcm Member
since 2000-10-11
Posts 222England 
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Autumn’s command to slumber In sleepy tone is heard, “It’s time to prepare for winter Before its icy disposition stirs.” There are animals that take to shelter, To hibernate through harsher months; Having fattened on summer’s fruit They’re now ready for a leaner time. Leaves once green now lie, As cloth discarded to forest floor; With their naturally printed colours, Shades of yellow, orange, gold; Shades so vibrant, beautiful, lush: Nevertheless, they’re in decay. Yet, upon deceptively barren trees, Are the buds reserved for spring. If only our love could have matured To see us through the unforgiving times, But winters grip did cut no grace And withered our once fleshy hearts. If only, if only, if only, if only I had learnt nature’s lesson well, But I know, time has past, for our union now. Farewell my love, I wish you well! [This message has been edited by jonmcm (edited 10-28-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jonathan McMahon - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Jon, this is beautiful, and so sad, you've written this soooo well. Absolutely superb, I really love this one, probably because I wish that I could hibinate from August Bank Holiday until May day. I know it's a little longer than the forest creatures do, but still! Take care Marsha  Take back the hope you gave,- I claim Only a memory of the same Robert Browning |
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jonmcm Member
since 2000-10-11
Posts 222England |
Marsha, thank you for your kind comment  Jon |
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Ron K. Fox Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925 |
This definetely brings forth the picture of the birth and death of a love, the rollercoaster ride of love, and in the the final season. like it very much. |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
I liked this also, "if only" is way too big a part of my life. You said it. And the comparisons were great. Sandra |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
This is sad. I enjoyed it, just very sad. "When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass, and the sun drips honey."" Laurie Lee Kathleen |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Jon* Your use of imagery in this piece is wonderful and the emotion penned is well woven...Seems that even love has it's season. Excellent work~ |
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jonmcm Member
since 2000-10-11
Posts 222England |
Hi Ron, Sandra, Irish Rose and Butterflies_dont_cry Thanks for taking time out to read the poem and lending your kind comments. 'I only' hope that I'm learning from my relationship experiences. Regards Jon |
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Alle'cram Senior Member
since 2000-02-28
Posts 1816Texas |
Jon, So beautiful and filled with meaning. Don't dispare, look to spring for when the bud's appear. Lovely in flow and message. Marcy |
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jonmcm Member
since 2000-10-11
Posts 222England |
Marcy, thank you for your comment! Best wishes Jon |
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peppermint35 Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106Texas, USA |
For everything has a season....."if only"...it says so much.... Certainly makes one long for spring...maybe it will come early for you Pepper "I honor the place in you, that when you are in that place, and I am in that place in me, we are in the same place" Ram Dass |
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Rainydays Member
since 2000-10-21
Posts 324 |
Hello Jon, this is a lovely poem in its sadness and elemental essence. As I read, I was reminded of "Down By the Salley Gardens"...do you know it? It is a deceptively tranquil song, originally penned as a poem by Yeats. Beautiful work, thank you. Rainydays |
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jonmcm Member
since 2000-10-11
Posts 222England |
Pepper, thank you for your kind comment. Rainydays, thank you too. I hadn't read the Yeats poem, but I've just done a quick search for it and I see what you mean. Thank you both Jon |
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